Hello friends of this wonderful community, I hope you're all well. Today I decided to participate in @miriannalis's initiative I'm willing to let go of the need to... I've been a bit absent here, but this topic made me want to express my ideas, feelings, and emotions. I think it's a perfect fit for this moment in my life.
Estoy dispuesta a soltar la necesidad de...
I'm willing to let go of the need for...
Lately, I've been feeling frustrated, discouraged, shut down, minimized, and disappointed about motherhood. My daughters are 8 and 6, and these past few days, they've been repeating the phrase "my mom is boring," so much so that one day they wanted to stay with an aunt and not go home with me because they insisted being with me was boring. Their aunt said this to me as a joke, but it hurt. It's one of those things that seems silly, but I felt hurt. At times, I think I'm making too much of it, but when they repeat it a lot, they say it all the time, I feel like it's real. I am a boring mom.
I don't want to be one, and I know it's something I can change, but I must let go of the need to be a perfect mom. I'm tormented by the idea of not planning/organizing my day, of not having everything figured out, and I've gotten to the point of listing and ordering the day's activities chronologically. This is incredibly boring, to be honest, but it's what gives me peace of mind, it gives me security, and it's something I've carried with me since I was very young. Could it be because I'm a Virgo?
I need to be in control, I need to be perfect. My motherhood has been my weak point these past few years, and I've been afraid of being judged and criticized, even though that's going to happen anyway. I want to be so many things for my daughters, and that's leading me down a path of bitterness.
Entonces.. ¿Quiero ser la mejor mamá del mundo o quiero ser la mejor mamá para mis hijas?
So... Do I want to be the best mom in the world or do I want to be the best mom to my daughters?
My daughters are crying out for me to let go, to release the pressure, to untie the knots I've made in my life and am making in theirs, and to relax a little more. There's nothing wrong with that; I have to learn to enjoy the unexpected, the unforeseen, and let some days pass without much worry. The need to be productive, self-sufficient, brave, optimistic, kind, perfect, proactive, and so on, makes me forget to enjoy the little things that motherhood brings: the happiness of my daughters and my own happiness.
I recognize that it's quite a challenge, but feeling the way I feel now is something I can't allow myself to do. I am more than this. And if I must change to find the best for myself and those closest to me, I will do it, one way or another. I'll start by asking myself these affirmations:
"Estoy dispuesta a soltar la necesidad de controlar a mis hijas, para que puedan ser ellas mismas y también puedan tomar decisiones sobre nuestro día a día".
"I'm willing to let go of the need to control my daughters so they can be themselves and make decisions about our daily lives."
"Estoy dispuesta a soltar la necesidad de perfección, y dedicarme a ser feliz en vez de perfecta."
"I'm willing to let go of the need for perfection, and dedicate myself to being happy instead of perfect."
"Estoy dispuesta a soltar la necesidad de controlar lo incontrolable, para evitar la frustración y sentirme segura con el presente".
"I'm willing to let go of the need to control the uncontrollable, to avoid frustration and feel secure in the present."
"Estoy dispuesta a soltar la necesidad de exigirme más de la cuenta, para empezar a liberarme de cargas y para disfrutar más de la vida como es."
"I'm ready to let go of the need to push myself too hard, to begin to free myself from burdens and to enjoy life more as it is."
"Estoy dispuesta a soltar la necesidad de culparme cada vez que las cosas no salen como planeo y aceptar cada situación, para aprovechar las oportunidades y abrirle la puerta a la diversión."
"I'm willing to let go of the need to blame myself whenever things don't go as planned and embrace every situation, seizing opportunities and opening the door to fun."
There's much to learn and recognize about ourselves and our surroundings, and thanks to these exercises we can work on that. It will always be a pleasure to write for this community; see you soon.
Es normal que se preocupe por sus hijas, a todas las mamás le sucede querer protegerlos contra viento y marea.
Poco a poco debe de dejar de ser tan estructurada y darle paso a la diversión con moderación.
Interesante publicación, Saludos 😊
Muchas gracias, encontrar la justa medida de todo y así estar en paz.. las etapas de mis hijas van volando.. aprecio tu comentario 🥰
Below are some handy links of delegations:
Hola, creo que intentar ser una mama perfecta es algo imposible, sobre todo porque la sociedad dicta demasiadas reglas, las cuales irónicamente se contradicen entre ella. Me alegra mucho que dejes ir esa necesidad, porque no necesitas ser perfecta, solo tienes que dar lo mejor de ti misma.
Saludos y bendiciones.
Realmente despues de escribir este post recordé una parte de la pelicula Barbie donde entra en crisis al explicar todo lo que una mujer debe hacer o debe ser.. ahora que ya soy consiente de ello lo empezaré a trabajar.
Tremendo reto!!! Lo sé porque tengo una historia similar. Todo se trata de voluntad y fé .
Como todo reto. Pero tenemos ganas, suerte en tu proceso..
Gracias. Te deseo éxitos !!!
Discord Felicitaciones, su publicación ha sido votada por @ dsc-r2cornell. Puedes usar el tag #R2cornell. También, nos puedes encontrar en