Optimist: "the glass is half-full!"
Pessimist: "the glass is half-empty!"
Realist: "Why are we arguing about a urine sample?"
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Optimist: "the glass is half-full!"
Pessimist: "the glass is half-empty!"
Realist: "Why are we arguing about a urine sample?"
Me: glasses are refillable.
I didn't get a chuckle out of your version though, so thanks for that!