G-dog, having done culling myself, I too have been in similar situations and sometimes breaking the "rules" of the job are necessary in order to maintain your own moral code.
I've taken the life of many animals in my previous career and while I never enjoyed doing it, there were reasons behind it and the job had to be done, so it was in the best manner possible for the animal involved. Having said that, I also recognize that if I had to go back in time and decide if I would do it all over again, I would have still done the problem animal management because I still to this day believe in and stand for the protection and conservation of the indigenous animals that I was an ambassador for in that role as a conservation manager.
Yesterday I didn't perform my job at the best of my ability but I made a judgement that allowed me to go home and feel comfortable about my choice. Maybe I'll take that kangaroo someday and maybe not. I hope she and her baby don't cross that fence line though and then I'll not need to.
I think perhaps re-assess the first part of this statement - The best of your ability should also include your judgement calls, which from what I know of your culling history seem pretty sound based on safety and good principal. If I had to have been in your shoes boots yesterday I probably would have made the same decision you did and from your post it sits well with you, so it clearly was the right one for you and the circumstances at the time.
Have a good evening Galen
Ranger Andy
Moral code. I like those words together...It's sometimes impossible to stand by it I guess so at those times where it's possible I make it happen.
Thanks for sharing a little of your Ranger-days; I imagine there were some tough calls to make and that you made them with the animals' best at heart even should that mean termination.
That last paragraph? Yeah I get it and thank you. Thanks also for addressing the shoes comment Andy, you know shoes just isn't legit.
Have a good day Andy.