My grandmother was discharged from the hospital a couple of days ago. I was helping primarily with medical aspects of her care while she was hospitalized (fortunately, I have the medical background to make sure that she was getting the optimal workup and treatment - there was no question that I would use it). Overall, the doctors did a pretty good job there, although there were some misses that we caught along the way. We didn't make a huge fuss over them, but ensured that everything was corrected.
Well, she did end up with two broken ribs. She qualifies, and would be covered by insurance, for a home care nurse, physical and occupational therapy, and a home attendant for 5 days per week. Unfortunately, as stubborn as she is, she does not want to utilize a home attendant, despite the fact that their services would be completely covered by insurance and would actually help her (and my grandfather) with activities around the house, as well as help her be more active with daily walks.
Her refusal of this service is because she doesn't like strangers roaming around her house... but the consequences of this stubbornness are quite substantial. She'll leave herself at greater risk for injuring herself on a daily basis, decompensate due to inactivity (which I can predict because she's not active even when she does have time off), create more work for my grandfather, and make us worry about her constantly. We've explained this to her, and she does understand, but still refuses.
It's understandable that for a person who's used to independence, this can be quite a substantial change. I do get it. However, she's not even willing to give it a try. It's stressed us out just as much as her hospitalization because we know the short-term and long-term risks involved, especially during this crucial recovery period, plus as she gets older.
We're still talking to her, but ultimately, she still has the mental capacity to make her own decisions, as dumb as they may be. It will certainly cause us more chronic stress, and more than likely result in her suffering more injuries as she gets older - although I certainly pray that I'm wrong.
We still have to set up a bunch of things for her, and then focus on my mother's health, which has also been deteriorating. My grandmother was hospitalized just as she was due for an important test, and this had to be rescheduled as well - and hopefully she'll be able to get it next week.
Screw 2024, man. This has been one of the worst years for my family. I'd give all of my financial earnings from this year - and from prior ones - to go back to how things were at the beginning of the year. Sure, they weren't perfect, but they were far better than they are right now.
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Caring for loved ones is a privilege and a challenge.
Here's your #FREECOMPLIMENT - you sound like a good grandson. It's a fortunate thing for your family that you are in a position to help your grandmother.
I've cared for a brother when he was going through chemo, and my father with late stage Parkinson's. It's hard. It's doubly hard to watch someone we love suffer.
Keep your head up, and don't forget to take care of yourself.
Appreciate your kind words and experience, Edwin!
If only my grandmother would give herself the chance to try a home attendant, I'm
sure she'd come around, and this entire ordeal would be significantly easier. That would've been a reasonable halfway point to meet, but there's simply no compromise with her, unfortunately. She's a wonderful grandmother - I could not imagine one who cares more - but her decision is hurting everyone.
Fortunately, I'm on vacation from my job, so I was able to be with her virtually the entire time. My mother and grandfather also took days off from work. When we go back to work, this is going to become far more difficult.
I'm choosing to limit my future job prospects to an area that's in very close vicinity to where my grandparents live, and I will not be taking any vacations that are more than a couple of hours from their place - which means I'm not going anywhere for a long time lol!
2025 will be so awesome for you that you'll forget about 2024. It's difficult for your grandmother to recognized how good of a grandson she has. Glad to hear she's out of the hospital, now on to the next challenge. Keep the faith!
!BBH
I'll definitely try to keep the faith, if only for the sake of my family. It's quite difficult right now. I don't often claim to have a crystal ball, but in this scenario, I know exactly the outcome of her actions, and it's very bleak. Hopefully 2025 will be a year of improvement for everyone, but I'm going to keep my expectations very grounded.
Hope you have a wonderful 2025 coming up as well!
@freecompliments! @ironshield likes your content! so I just sent 1 BBH to your account on behalf of @ironshield. (38/100)
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Live, with LOVE, its all anyone can do.
!pimp
ps thank goodness we have a blog to vent this stuff out.
That's right. I find myself obligated (by my own innate choice) to show my love to my grandparents through actions. I only wish I could do more.