I am one of those people that has managed somehow to remain single for a very long period of time. In my younger years I was a bit of a "late bloomer" as I was really just not cut out for dating until I was already in college. I had no "game" and simply wasn't very good at approaching girls. Then out of nowhere I got extremely good at it when I was in my early 20's as I bounced from girl to girl, most of which at least for an outside observer was probably "out of my league" but it was just a game I got really good at.
This continued for around a decade and a half but due to various reasons, including my own arrogance and thirst to "try out as much as I could" I never settled with one woman and was always looking for an alternative. I look back now and kind of think that this was a mistake on my part but then again, since I am quite happy with the way my life is it is easy to believe that if I had done things differently that I would not be where I am right now and since I like where I am right now, perhaps it is best that I did things exactly the way that I did. I do find that I am pretty terrible at dating these days though and I think my days of having dating "mojo" are behind me now.
This doesn't bother me a great deal but I also very rarely meet someone that is so perfect for me that I would really even put forth the necessary effort to attempt to charm her or spend time with her. I did a LOT of dating and I am certainly not an incel. It's just really difficult to get me interested in anyone honestly. I have chased away dozens of women in the past 4 years or so because I am honestly just not all the fussed about having a relationship. This all changed last night.
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I use a cartoon stock image from a "perfect couple" search for a reason. I couldn't take any pictures of her or us and you will understand why later on. Basically this person is everything that I look for in a partner and I met her at a film festival. She was one of the directors and creators of a short film that I genuinely enjoyed so I first started talking to her not out of an interest in flirting, but because my praise for her film was real. The flirting just kind of started to happen on its own as it was evident right from the start that there was, for some reason, mutual interest on both our parts. Without trying to do so or being manipulative, I was extremely charming and had her laughing right from the start. It became evident to me quite early on in our conversation that she was actually flirting with me and this is something I don't often experience anymore as I have gotten older.
Physically speaking, she is absolutely exactly what it is I am looking for as well. She was short, not is a freakishly short sort of way but I prefer that the people I date be a bit smaller than I am. This is just a personal preference. She was around 5 foot 3 and to me, this is ideal. She is also petite and clearly looks after herself with exercise. She had nice skin, he had shoulder length red hair and the main thing that sealed the deal for me was that she was really cute, even though she wasn't wearing much makeup. This is something that I think is quite unusual since I feel like most women really put on way too much makeup. This girl barely had any on at all and still was beautiful. Natural beauty is a rarity.
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Again, this above image is not her but whoever that is she is stunning.
The girl I actually met was a bit shy, but after talking a little bit she came out of her shell a lot and we were not just talking about her film after a while, but we started to realize that we have basically everything in common. Every single thing that she said she was interested in or films she had seen that inspired her were things that we had in common. I was not just pretending to like the things she liked, they just happened to be true.
Literally everything we spoke about just happened to be a mutual interest. It started to become increasingly funny to both of us that whatever the next thing the other person said was something that the other also finds interesting or is actually a rather large part of their lives. It was like something out of a movie how unbelievably compatible the two of us were. I was showing her pictures of Nadi, my dog, and she was just delighted at how cute my dog was and told me that she really wants to meet her. I of course was really excited to make that happen.
She was touching me a bit at that point and making a lot of eye contact and things were just effortlessly moving forward in a way that made all of my relationship failures in the past seem as though they were leading me to exactly this point in my life.
So why is this story tragic? Was she married? Did her boyfriend come around the corner and break up the chemistry between us? Did she tell me that she was leaving town the next day? Did I lose her in the crowd and we hadn't yet exchanged phone numbers? Nah... it isn't any of those things.
The real reason the story is tragic is also the reason why I cannot possibly show you a picture of her even if I had taken one. I can't show you a picture of the most perfect woman I have ever met in my life because I heard my dog bark and that was when I woke up in my bedroom. It was all a dream and this perfect person doesn't actually exist, nor does the film festival or any of the other aspects of this magical encounter.
This is just my luck but before anyone starts to feel sorry for me just know that I am perfectly fine with being single. I am actually very very fussy when it comes to someone that I will date and it is largely my own fault that I am still single. It's just a bit disappointing that the most perfect woman I have ever met in my life was just a figment of my imagination. I swear, sometimes I think that my brain is intentionally attempting to torment me when I go to sleep :P
Nadi chased her away lol. They say it happens when you are not even looking and funny enough have been hit on so many times when I have been married. The weirdest one was by a waitress who left her number on my bill. I have had two nurses fighting over me and I have to admit one of them was rather hot and I hoped she would win. This happened all in front of my wife who was not amused and stayed for the entire time I was in the hospital. Maybe you will find someone. Who knows, but there has to be someone out there for you. I guess living in Vietnam does cut down the percentages of that happening.
I'm not really "out there" looking and yes, living in a country where you do not speak the language severely limits the pool. I'm fine with it though and totally agree that meeting someone organically is the best way to go.
Oh man, not the way I saw this going at all. That's pretty crazy. You know, I didn't date a lot when I was younger, I've basically had like three long term relationships in my life and I almost wonder if that was a big mistake. I mean, I learned a lot from them, but I feel like I may have settled when I shouldn't have. I hope you find a person one day, and if you don't, I have confidence you will be just fine!
oh and I refused to settle down and I guess I am paying the price for it now. I was more than a bit of a player back in the day and it was a lot of fun although in the long run it all seems a bit counterproductive. Whatever! It lead me to where I am today.
i'm cool with it either way.... was a great dream though even though it had to be rudely interrupted by life
Perhaps she will visit you again one night...
it's a good thing you warned about that tragic ending. haha good story though
thanks! it's true too!
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