I got into a discussion with Mum today. It erupted from a wedding program she attended yesterday. She told me about how interesting the event was and also hammered out the reason why she appreciated it so much.
The groom and bride were reuniting after a divorce from their partners on both ends. The bride was the family we know. They tried their best and made it a colorful event. I guess the joy came from appreciating their union compared to their past life.
Mum told me about how the bride's divorced husband was so annoying the first time she knew him. She ranted about how he had disappointed and disgraced the bride and her family members too. She said it was like she knew he would never make a good groom.
They came so late for the program and then didn’t even appear for the engagement program at all. Then even when his parents arrived she noticed they were not together. They made it appear so obvious which shouldn’t be so, at least for that day they should have united and not made it even look like they were not together.
From this Mum concluded that apart from him having some attitude to himself which is so bad, he was also affected by the fact that he didn’t have both parents together in his upbringing.
Only a few most times are not affected by this, though there are some that even though they have both parents bring them up, still won't be a better or responsible person, and there are some that have single parents or none and still have the best attitude to themselves.
I made a post a few days ago about the effect of my parents on my life and how I have learned to handle relationships and marriage too. I have witnessed several ups and downs in their marriage but still, they practiced endurance and patience.
Most times we can't blame children who happen to experience single parenting, and we can’t also blame the parents who made the choice. I guess at times it's the best choice to make for their kids. Better for the kids to try and learn how to be with others rather than to keep witnessing and learning something bad for the parents.
I have a cousin who is a single mother. I knew the reason behind her divorce and it was worth it. The abuse was so much that the 3-year-old boy began to see it as something normal. If that should continue till he grows up then he might see it as something normal to abuse in marriage.
In conclusion
It's best to avoid it happening, but at times there are situations that would warrant making it happen. And it might just be the best decision the parent would make for their kids and themselves.
This is my response to the HIVE LEARNERS weekly prompt in hive learners community for the Week 153 Edition 1 and the topic to be discussed is A PARENT ABSENT
!LOLZ
!ALIVE
!PIZZA
!BEER
Not having both parents around do affect people a lot. Most of us can relate how his upbringing was affected.
Sure. That’s bound to happen in life.
Everything happens for a reason.
I'm glad those couples found love again despite breaking out from their previous partners.
Yeah. And hopefully they have kids they can train and upbring as one parent
Having the guide and love of both relatives seems to me that it is very important in the life of any child, because that drives its growth, security and personality as a human being, it is one of the most basic things that everyone should have.
In my case, I didn't have it, and I'm broken inside. There is no way to fix it.
Ooh. So sorry about that. I hope time could fix you. And maybe when you meet with people who wants you for who you are. They is always a chance for change.
Having both parents is good but in a situation whereby the wrong values would be instilled in the child, it's better to stop it from happening. Else the cycle continues.
Yeah that progression is what should stop. And then let them have their lives. Though the journey might not the same as they wanted. And sometimes it might even turn out to be better
Having only one parent in your life does have effect one an individual in most cases. And I’ve seen it with my own eyes how some kids act cos they lack the presence of one parent in their lives . But some people do turn out great also.
Yeah yeah. Let just say what’s meant to be will surely be. Though the journey might not be as it should be have or it might even turn out otherwise. So what will be will be. Thanks for the contribution my Accra runaway girlfriend
Haha, you’re most welcome. Thanks for sharing.❤️
A pleasure