You are very right. The problem is everyone has free will. Everyone decides for themselves and from there, passes on to their children and even their friends, the mistakes. We all know what is wrong and what is right, but the choice is entirely ours. It is our families and children, that are important as you say, we must take care of them, not to used even when we're dead to fix our problems. It's not fair, because they have life of their own. But not everyone sees the true meaning of life, most prefer to find easier way or just to enjoy while they live without actual thinking for other people. That's life 🙂
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It's terrible for parents not to put our children into consideration when making important decisions in life. I know we have the right to do whatever we want but it shouldn't be at the expense of our offspring's wellbeing.
If a person is not mature enough we can't expect this from him/her. That's one ugly truth in life. In some cases the child leaves and creates better life for him/herself. Rare but it happens