Greetings my beautiful family, happy new month, and welcome to the last month of the year 2024.
Sharing my story always gives me joy because it's a lesson learned from a real-life experience.
Friendship is important because, in life, we need one another. But, when it's taken for granted, it becomes a problem. Using your friend to pay your bills, she becomes a bank ATM for withdraw without considering how the borrowed funds will be repaid.
Friendship is sweet when understanding rules and when there are healthy boundaries, you experience peace knowing your friendship is based on respect.
Few months ago, I took some steps to a healthy relationship, making boundaries to save my mental health. Having supportive friends who cared for one another when in need, so I visited one of my friends, she took her time to narrate an incident in which one of us owed her a lot of money It had been months, and she had refused to pay, saying she would pay the following month. Being that I had a good relationship with her I went to her house and confronted her to quickly pay up her depth.
She felt so bad that I was aware of the depth she owed, the next day she paid off her depth and cut off her relationship with the lady she owed.
Now, we became best of friends, but little did I know I was her next lender. She started with a low request, which she paid off after a month, then she progressed to a larger amount, which took her months to pay back. I became worried, so I stopped giving and told her I was low on funds. She kept asking, but I would rather give her the items instead of the money. I became worried that I gave her money out of pity and made her promise to pay it back the same day.
This time, I needed the money, so I asked for my money the next day, she response: "My dear, please bear with me, I just noticed my bank is having a system upgrade, I will send the money when they are done with the upgrade
At this point, I felt used; She took advantage of the recent bank System upgrade in the country. Then I remembered the lady who complained about her frequent demand for money and how she took forever to pay back. Collecting my money back was the end of our relationship.
If there were financial boundaries in our relationship, that would have saved me the mental stress I went through in the process of collecting my money.
Saying NO was all I needed to save the relationship and the stress of feeling used.
I learned the hard way, but am glad I took the best decision cutting off the relationship with her and saving myself the stress of dealing with all her money issues.
I know this story would help someone's relationship and set boundaries for a lasting relationship.
My entry for week 142 edition 1.
Friendship with Healthy boundaries
Cutting off a friend who consistently demand for a loan was the best way I fix my mental stress which almost made me lose my mind.
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