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Raising an upright child is not an easy task. Better still, a child growing up to become a responsible adult entails many things. The second statement stemmed from the fact that not all responsible adults were raised by responsible parents. Just like a child raised by responsible parents can turn to the opposite when he moves out of the control of his parents, we have some children raised by careless parents turn to become better adults due to external influence or some level of intrinsic motivation.
The role of parents in the lives of their children, especially in the formative years, can't be overemphasized. They are the first and most important role models to the children. Children tend to learn whatever they see their parents do. They would want to replicate it.
Many children learned smoking and drinking from their parents. Though I don't think that there is any parent that would intentionally teach his child the act of smoking and drinking, seeing their parents do it is enough for the children to emulate them in secret. Of course there is always room for taking an act to the next level. As a result, a child that learned to smoke cigarettes from his father can advance to taking marijuana and other hard drugs when he joins his peers in the street.
The lack of love from some parents during the children's formative years has destroyed their lives later on. A child that meets his parents practicing the relationship of cat and rat would most probably grow up without the spirit of love for others.
Another major challenge that can destroy the proper upbringing of a child is when parents over pampers their children. When I was growing up, there was a popular saying that two people give birth to a child, but hundreds of people train the child. This is no longer the case among the present generation of parents. An average parent in this present generation doesn't want any other person to scold her child.
If parents can put all these in place, there is a high possibility of raising an upright child. If peradventure the child commits a major infraction in society, the blame goes to the child. The parents have done their parts, and the children are expected to do theirs. In the event that a child lacks proper upbringing, the blame for committing an offense goes to his or her parents who failed him.
However, all I have talked about is on moral and cultural ground. As far as the law of the land is concerned, an adult that commits infractions is made to answer for his infractions. Anyone above the age of 18 in Nigeria is held responsible for his actions, irrespective of the way he or she was brought up. If parents fail, children can still find a way not to fail themselves.
I will conclude by stating that no one rule holds for all the instances. In one instance, the parents could be of blame, while in another instance, the blame goes to the child. While the parents do their best to train a child to the right path, the child should make sure he holds on to the lessons and grows up to be an upright adult.
Instead of over pampering we should provide kids learning about human values. We can't ignore their misbehavior and tussle with others. We need to deal them with Justice.
That's the way forward. They need to be guided properly.
I also think it is important to not over-pamper kids. Shower them with love, but don’t over pamper them.
Exactly... There should be a clear line between the two.
Thank you for the support, @pandex