Parenting is not easy, and most of the time, because of what the parents passed through before they were able to give birth to their children, it makes them either too soft or overprotective. Especially the mother's side, I've seen so many scenarios on these overprotective parents.Given examples of my neighbor.
The father happens to be a dad that is so overprotective over all his children; the mother does not really care. She only tells what to do and what not to do, but you see the husband; he knows the ins and outs of these children.He was so harsh to the extent that the children didn't have access to anything, even a phone. And he monitors them all the time.
Especially the female among them, well, God did good; he has a female child who was 14 years old then; she was 16 now. I was telling a story about two years ago.So here is what happened: the father was too protective. I mean, if there is another word for overprotective, I will use it. So it's time for the lady to sit for JAMB examinations; the father hired a teacher for her who happens to be a male university teacher. Unknowingly, time passed, and the father all of a sudden knew that the child didn't do menstruation in the month she was supposed to do it.
That's for you to know the father even goes ahead to calculate her monthly period, well, to cut the long story short. It was later discovered that the only little time for lessons, the teacher has found a way to impregnate the child. And this is a result that she only had that time, and of course this lady doesn't know anything about sex education.Some parents really think being overprotective will solve issues but only worsen their children's situations.
Here are some better ways to raise a child.
Make them your friend: one thing we need to know is that, either way, your children will find someone who he/she will be talking to, and the person should be no one but you. Your child should be able to discuss anything with you. Even with her sex life. This is the only way she can be safe, and you can also have peace of mind.Some parents got mad when a child of fourteen years old had a boyfriend, but instead of getting mad, why can't you guide her and teach her what sex education is all about? Let them be aware of the part of their body and what it works for.Children who have a good connection and friendship with their parents will hardly fall victim.
Be their guide, not their controller: another thing to do is to be their guide; don't give them unnecessary control. Once you start controlling them, they won't feel safe.Set rules with ease: set rules for what to follow and what not to; anytime they go against your rules, discipline them in a good way. And make sure you always talk to them.
Be a good listener: A parent should be a good listener. When your child needs to talk, listen to whatever they have to say, even if it is rubbish. Be their gist partner, let them be happy anytime they see you coming around, and let them be safe around you and not around strangers.
In summary, the moment your child can be comfortable around you and tells you about everything he/she does. It means you have gained their trust. Your child should be able to tell you who they are seeing, when they are seeing them, and all that. A parent should be flexible.
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Guide them and not control them, that alone is a very good point on how to go about parenting.
Words of the wise. I don’t blame the overprotective father. But he should have known that there are stages to everything. There are stages when he has to be protective and there are stages when the kids need their own freedom and make their own decision
The overprotective father thinks "the world is scary, and the only way he knows to protect his daughter is being strict". However, the world evolves, so is parenting.
Sometimes parents are even the main cause of their children’s wrong doings. We need to expose these kids to the real world so they won’t be naive and be taken advantage of.
It’s sad to hear teachers taking advantage of female kids.
parenting is not an easy task because your mistakes and good decisions will be followed by your children.