Communication is indeed the key to dealing with this situation especially with our elderly, and in truth professional caregivers can help out with these tasks.
But the personal unlike you, I'll preferably have them stay with we their family, even though it has it drawback, family knows what's best and how to treat their own than an outsider would, and given the relentless effort these parents put in fending for us in our vulnerable as a child, it's best we reciprocate same than throw them out to a retirement home like they've no family members.
Oh! I will definitely take care of my parents. Whether or not they choose to live with me or not. But I will prefer they don’t live with me, there is always this joy traveling a distance to meet your parents or grandparents. 🤭
And I wasn’t referring to a nursing home when I said they can be taken care of by others. That others can be your other siblings or relatives.
Like I mentioned, you might not always be around to cater for them but that doesn’t in anyway mean you love them less or won’t care for them. I know of some old people that prefer to remain in their hometown or go to their hometown when they can’t do so much again. The truth is, you won’t want to follow them there, well you might but most of us won’t. So all we can do is make where ever they choose to be comfortable and conducive for them.