I feel strange today. I know it's Chooseday and I do remember to always choose happy. Yet something seemed to have flipped that made it all feel oh so wrong. I was happy when I got to finish earlier than usual last night. All seems to be going well, even with the kitties. However, it seemed all was not well like I thought.
Each morning I do a silent roll call of all the kitties and look for them. I like finding out where they like to lounge mostly. Lo and behold for the shock of my life when I found Nian lifeless on the homemade scratch box in the cats' room. She looked like she was just sleeping soundly. When I went to check on her, she was already stiff. She must have passed in the wee hours when I was asleep 'coz I remember saying good night to her. π
A throwback photo -- Nian just a kitten on the left with cat mom Grumpy. The latter's been missing for over a year now. She went outside and never came back. I honestly don't know if there was foul play involved, but Grumpy's five years old then and practically grew up outside. What are the odds she would lose her way? π€ Nian grew up inside mostly. I had to bring her and her siblings inside when Mom passed, as she almost got lost in the adjacent building when she was a kitten (around six months old).
What a way to start the year. I'm still in shock at the moment and have yet to move towards sadness. I still can't believe that Nian passed away so soon. She just turned four last February first. I treated them to chicken nuggets then. I have beautiful memories of the kitties esp. siblings Xin, Nian, Kuai, and Le. Now, there are only two left -- Xin & Le. π All the kitties that are gone will always be cherished. πβ€οΈπ‘
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"What we achieve inwardly will change outer reality." - Plutarch
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Never stop growing or learning. Yeah, I'm reminded of that every so often. Right now, I need to deal with my loss. It's a slow process and I do admit I need healing. It's not just my kitties I'm talking about, but I'm still a long way from healing from Mom's loss. It's been almost four years. The pain is real, but my physical pain tops even my emotional ones. I suppose in a way, it's a blessing in disguise. There's something about physical pain that takes my mind off the other pain. I don't know if that makes sense at all. I'm working on it. I know that each day I work on my attitude and my mindset on how I view things. Yes, that includes how I deal with loss. One day at a time...
I feel strange right now. βοΈ Like I said I feel like something flipped. I can't explain it, but I feel it. It's part of intuitive me. However, I'm going to trust the universe and its process, so I'm going to sit back and watch life unfold. πβ€οΈπ‘ On the lighter side of life, Murphy's Law was in effect earlier as my printer (of more than four years of working from home) suddenly wouldn't print well even after I changed the ink cartridge. The good news is I now have a newer printer. Hopefully, it will last long. π
I actively work on these affiliate sites daily. Right now the goal is to reach payout again on LL. I'm less than 70 cents away more or less. π
All righty, it's time to wrap things up today. I need to recharge for another work day. I pray there wouldn't be any more unwelcome surprises tomorrow. I can only handle so much. π Do enjoy your day. Nighty night from Manila. Ta-tah! π
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I'm so sorry for your loss, It must have been such a heartbreaking moment to find her like that.
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Thoughtful day !INDEED
thanks for the support π !LUV
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So very sorry to hear about Nian. Great photo, he looked so much like his mother !LUV
!HOPE it gets better from here.
!ALIVE
Nian's a cat mom too and left behind three kittens (ten months old now). I hope all three would grow up to be healthy kitties too. I still have to get used to her absence. It's not easy as I raised her from kitten stage to four years. So many memories !INDEED thank you.
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I am so sorry for your loss of Nian.
Our mothers passed around the same time and when I am with a sister and we speak of her, one or both of us will cry. I wonder if the pain will ever get easier, it did with Dad but Mothers we have a special bond.
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Your kitties are beautiful and well looked after. Unforseen occurrences do happen. Sorry for your loss and take heart.
thank you for the words of encouragement π π !LUV
Good to be !ALIVE
Cheers π· !WINE
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Hope your feelings pass soon
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I feel strange 'coz I'm still shocked. I suppose I will get to the grieving stage soon enough π well, 2025 has just been declared strange by me. !WEIRD till it redeems itself !LOL
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