I hear you :( The footage was terrifying! Really... I couldn't even watch it!
Philosophy helped me, my darling woman.
I'd recommend this site
She writes short posts to share a variety of amazing philosopher's and artist's writing and it really helped me find some acceptance. But, honestly, I don't think we ever are the same after some experiences. We need to find a way, somehow, to carry on without losing our souls and hearts.
Philosophy helps! There are so many amazing minds whoh've transformed mud into gold.
p.s. You're one of them. Stay you <3