We find “Firestorm” Jonathan Mills in his normal environment. A gaming store.
He sits with a Game Master screen for 5th Edition Dungeons and Dragons in front of him with four teenage boys sitting with their characters in front of them and dice.
Jonathan Mills - Josh, we are to you now. You have an orc in front of you and an orc for each of your comrades. What do you do?
Josh looks down at his character sheet and gets his d20 out in order to roll to hit. That’s when he sets the die down and looks at Jonathan.
Josh - I think I saw you on Wikipedia. Aren’t you the guy that called himself Dr. Claw for a brief time and used some ghostly laser to destroy Edmonton?
Jonathan smiles, but that sorta fades.
Jonathan Mills - That was a tv show that I was on. Yes, I bought the gauntlet from a thrift store of the late Dr. Claw from CLAW and went on a rampage…in the show. None of it was real life.
Josh - Oooooh that makes sense. Because they totally took you apart at the end of one of the seasons and you wouldn’t be here if that was the case.
Jonathan Mills - Right.
Josh - How was it playing a bad guy?
Jonathan Mills - It’s just not who I am. I don’t know why in the few tv series that I was involved in that I was normally the bad guy, going on about some scheme to rule the world. If it was all true, I would be rotting in a max security prison right now. As you can see, I am not in prison.
Josh - Ok, I hit the orc in front of me with my sword. I roll a 27 to hit.
Jonathan Mills - That hits, roll your damage.
Josh - I did 38 damage.
Jonathan Mills - The heck? I mean ok, the orc is dead cloven from shoulder to the opposite pelvis. Now, AJ, it’s your orc’s turn and he attacks with his axe. Does 18 hit?
AJ looks down at his character sheet and smiles big.
AJ - It does not. I think it’s my turn now and I cast magic missile!
Jonathan Mills - Well, that strikes him. Five missiles right? Roll damage.
AJ - 20 damage!
Jonathan Mills - The magic missiles strike the orc-like broadside from a warship and bring him down. He’s dead!
AJ - Hey don’t you have a match in Chaotic Pro Wrestling?
Jonathan Mills - Why yes. Yes, I do. What about it?
AJ - You’ll be tagging with Gabriel Blight and Joe Simpson against Mighty Frank, Black Count, and Marcus Filth Jr.
Jonathan Mills - Yeah, I am in that match. I haven’t had the time to look any of these guys up.
AJ - Are you going to go into the match blind then?
Jonathan Mills - Yeah, that’s probably what I’m going to do. I’ll just go in there and try my best.
Josh - That doesn’t sound like a very smart thing to do.
Jonathan Mills - I know. That’s what I do. It’s what I live for. To fly by the seat of my pants. Shall we get on with the game?
A general agreement goes around the table and the scene fades to black as the game continues.