I will be continuing to write more intimate takes and deep dives on topics that relate personally to me here on this account, @housecatharsia is the account in which we(@kaliphae & me) post about our more general situation, documenting our entire process from getting kicked out of our home without any warning, on a whim packing our belongings, brownie 15 year old labrador & our 2 Royal Pythons, driving to Croatia to buy a property in need of solid renovation with the remaining money that we had left. Intent on building with our own hands a real life Bee-Sanctuary & Self-Sufficient HomeStead. A sacred temple & nucleus attempting to germinate the seeds of a new world. The Great Renewal instead of the Great Reset.
We intend to create this place into a sanctuary retreat where during the day we both can physically engage & work with the life around us. While at night we can sit down & put those experiences to paper in the form of words or paintings. Or some other artistic medium. During the day we can build upon the empty canvas of our Physical Sanctuary, making it come alive & at night we can work on expressing the inner canvas of the impressions left behind by the living relationships to the land, animals, flowers & each other that we cultivate.
I find myself now having signed the ownership papers, but still a few things need to be attended, water, telephone, garbage disposal registration need to be completed under my name.
As this is happening we still are living together with the previous owner, who is really a beautiful person, but sharing the same space until he has completed packing & leaves has left the place still in an energetic dynamic of in-completion, which I am really looking forward to finally see it through, so that we may really get to unpack properly ourselves & start getting our hands truly dirty by emptying all the junk that has accumulated in the house itself, creating space, then focusing on renovating the main living quarters via some diy insulating projects, really want to build my own fireplace/baking/stove. etc.
Yet my inner energy feels I need to first complete this exchange, before I invest myself into those activities. I want to see the situation in completion first, finishing one step, before diving blindly into my next step.
This whole situation ever since we got kicked out of our home, has been a great lesson in having to endure the torture of time & impatience in the face of being ready myself to move ahead, but having to passively wait until things completed before being able to take the next step.
Leaving our Old Home, was waiting to settle our finances, then waiting for my passport, since now I had my old one inactivated & had to wait for my new one to arrive by post until I could travel anywhere. Then the van we got to transport our belongings needed a battery replacement even though my passport had arrived and we were READY to go! On our first Day of finally having hit the road for our 1300KM drive to our current destination, KPHI got pulled over by Police for a Non-Crime which managed to cost us 350Euro, and being grounded for 12 hours, stuck not being able to continue the journey. Then we arrived here, we had to wait several days before even beginning the sale process, appointments kepts shifting forward unexpectedly, with the 15 year old dog that can't stand up or walk himself, we also had nowhere to go, and in a house that was still not ours officially, truthfully nothing I felt we could do, not until my name was signed.
End of February we had the great announcement that we will be kicked out of the our house, we were given a month to settle everything personally, by the 17th we had raced through all our obligations needing completion and finally were on the Road to Croatia. On the 19th we arrived at our Destination. This Tuesday I owned the House.
The whole ordeal has been fast paced in one sense, but grudgingly slow paced at others. When I consider that within 1 month of time exactly I have travelled to a foreign country, left my home of many many years, bought property that is the first property I have ever owned, I would not have imagined it could happen so fast.
Yet there were times where my patience has been grinding against its limits. Excruciating impatience, moments of intense frustration, full of desire to move, to act, to do something, but nothing to do. Life proposed Rest, but I wanted to create.
I have been facing all of these impatiences recently, I have tried to slow down to the best of my ability, staying true to my inner sense of waiting out the full completion before I move, & in the meantime to examine my frustration with the torture of needing to wait out time, to sit curiously with my own impatiences & see whether they have any truth to them, or whether they are just old habits that I just carry around due to still having a slightly skewed perception in the form of an inner belief that excessively obsesses with doing things RIGHT NOW, Instead
of Doing Things at the Right Time, OBSERVING EVERY NOW TO BE AWARE OF WHEN IT IS THE RIGHT TIME WITHOUT SACRIFICING RIGHT NOW.
Finding the ability to expand into my own sense of inner presence, sitting with the stirrings of my feeling of impotence, for example towards a dog which is exhausting to support at this stage, but doing otherwise I would never even consider, yet the impotence at times leaves me frustrated, impatient, sometimes wishing it to really finally be over, but I realize that those thoughts are just me who is exhausted from making probably more of an effort than is needed & dwelling to much on everything I could possibly still do to improve the situation instead of realising that up to this day I was potent enough, to feed him, carry him into the house, out of the house, take care of him despite his incontinence & pooing, he is alive & conscious & sharp & mentally fully present, intelligent, still full of appetite despite being able to do nothing more than be lying down, full of inner vitality, spirit, strength.
I am in awe at his Bravery in the Face of being so patient with himself & his body that is no longer allowing him to do anything other than to eat & drink, pea & poo, really. Yet he does not seem to pity himself at all, he is more seeking of attention, yes, more needy, more hungry and obsessive about food when he his, but he is definitely not suffering the impatience that I find myself suffering faced with far less dramatic situations or just momentary limits where I can't do something/act/ or move because there is a period of waiting I need to accommodate myself to.
I felt like I would open the conversation by just seeing what it would look like if I summed up one of the main themes that has been active for myself during this time of transition, transformation, adventure & stepping into an unknown I would not have believed to find myself in just less than a few months ago, not like this.
Yet so far oddly enough all the things that seemed like struggles in the past month, have brought with them such enriching treasures, that I feel that I am living through an orchestration composed by Life itself, trying to finally catch my attention on a level where he is attempting to break down some of my false logic & inner interpretations that have caused a wall of unecessary impatience to grow within me, stemming from a lack of trust in the benevolence of Life, maybe also a hint of overcompensated sense of control, or maybe more finding the inner peace & sobriety to not struggle against the things that are anyway not in my control anyway & never could be.
RK13, AEK
To find out more about our Adventure you can Check out what happened & more details about the Vision we are now attempting to Build from Scratch.
You can find also ways of donating to our cause in the above link, should you feel like you would contribute to helping us out in this situation & with our vision.
We also accept HIVE,HBD, just sent it to @housecatharsia. I hope you enjoyed this dive into one of many insights that have been running paralell to my day to day events in this entire transitionary process.
Oh wow, your life is very full right now.
So great to hear that you have found a forever home and one where you can make your dreams a reality.
We are tested to see if indeed they are what we want,but yes your life is full on at the moment.
But you got this, you both have.
Wishing you all the luck and good vibes and looking forward to hearing how it all goes xxxxx
Hahaha love the sound of that, forever home, makes it feel a lot less stressful, hard to believe still that it is so, still kind of dumbstruck by it all!
Yes luckily I got to test a lot of what I was told life is about in the previous space over the years, which has helped to really fine tune it down to for now being simply wanting a space to freely create, and also enough room & peace to learn to cultivate true relationships to the things/beings I surround myself with on a day to day basis, very disillusioned by all the superficial dreams sold to us globally, ready to just experiment trusting both our hearts & allow ourselves to be surprised by what reality we will get to experience in response to our steps.
Thank you very much for the encouragement and blessings 🙏💚🙏
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