gif from tenor
I know that I can be a little bit rough and raw with my words and I'm unapologetic about that. It's just how I am and a function of where I grew up. I love women, I respect them and I truly adore them irrespective of their facial limitations. I don't discriminate, as long as you have big booboo and arset.
There are many different types of women out there fr every man. From my experience, there are the afternoon girls, which are those ones that you're not scared of being seen with. The evening girls, which are the ones you can walk with at sunset, talking and behaving in a formal manner so that no one suspects you're attracted to her.
And then there are the night girls. These ones are the ones you only walk with at night. You put them in front of you and pretend like you're admiring them while in truth, you just don't want anyone suspecting that you're together. With some of them, you have to put the duvet over their head when hitting it, because their face makes it look like you're having sex with your ancestors.
In some extreme cases, you need duck tape over their mouths, because their moans sound like the cackles of poor old witches at the sight of a young blood. Eeeeee kaakuuu keekekeekee kuku kakakakaka Eieieieieie ah ah Le Le ah ah u u li li u u.
But like I said, I don't discriminate. I love them all. They're all lovely in their own ways, especially if they can ride.
I remember when I once picked up a clean and beautiful BMW. I loved it because it was so clean and I heard that it can ride very well. And they were not wrong. It was a monster at riding and was so damp and smooth that I felt like licking it. It was all going so well up until I eventually tried to lick it, only to find out that it was that time of the month.
I was so traumatized and disgusted that I started having a headache. So I had to go get some drugs at the pharmacy just to help me sleep. Upon getting there, I saw this other woman holding her head and complaining to the pharmacist of headache as well.
Then immediately, this tattered and raggedy looking man walked up to the entrance to the pharmacy, tapped gently on the woman's shoulder. She turned and was startled at what she saw..
Yes! What is it? she asked suspiciously
Don't be afraid ma. That's how mine started, you'll soon get used to it. the mad man said gently and walked away.
Like I said, I love women. I love them in all shapes and sizes and I remember when I was young and my mom would admonish me on respecting women and treating them right. She was always like "women should be treated with utmost care like eggs"
Then I asked her "Do you put sticks in eggs"?
"No" she replied looking confused
"Then why did aunty Kay tell uncle Udy to remove his stick from her the other night when I slept in their room"? I asked waiting patiently for an answer to my dilemma. Well, instead of answering my question, my mom made sure her brother and his wife never saw me again. Up until today, I still don't understand what happened that night.
And by the way, where I'm from, we used to call BMWs "Be My Wife!"
Welcome to my blog, you can relax and be rest assured of quality content on diverse topics. Feel free to air your views and opinions in the comments section, and It'll be my pleasure to learn and engage
I'm glad you cleared that up about the BMW!
Another great read, my friend. You almost make me wish I was single!
Don't let your wife see this comment though
To hell with her, she was the last one that ran a scam on me!
Your storytelling is definitely one of a kind! You have a fearless and raw approach that really sets your writing apart, and it's clear that you don't hold back—your boldness is refreshing. The way you mix humor with candid observations is something not everyone can pull off, but you manage to do it in your own unique style.
Your voice is unapologetically you, and that's something to be proud of. You dive headfirst into topics and aren’t afraid to push boundaries, which keeps your readers engaged and always guessing what’s coming next. The BMW metaphor was a clever and playful twist, and your childhood memory at the end adds a layer of depth to your narrative that makes people think.
Keep doing what you're doing, because your confidence in your voice is what makes your writing stand out. Embrace that raw energy and keep refining it—you’ve got something special here!
This is most refreshing and very encouraging.. Thank you very much