Pikmin is one of those games I have never been able to finish. I imagine it will always bring mixed feelings of incompleteness that are associated with phase of life changes for me.
I was in college when the first Pikmin came out on the Nintendo Gamecube. Being a Nintendo fanboy as a child, the cute Pikmin characters and Captain Olimar drew me in. College was a difficult transition for me, being on my own, making new friends, deciding what I wanted with my life. I was not ready to make those sort of decisions. Pikmin was an escape to a less complicated time.
Pikmin 3 Deluxe came out on the Nintendo Switch in 2020. I bought it to play with my then 15 year old son in 2021, shortly after we had completed Zelda BOTW. In previous posts, I wrote about my daughter's heart transplant, so our family has had its share of extreme stress. 2021 introduced two of the most emotionally difficult losses I have had as an adult.
My cousin and best friend died in January 2021. I was in the hospital with my daughter watching her recover from her first annual post-heart transplant catheterization when I found out my cousin had been hospitalized. My mom and his mom did not get along, so the family dynamics were such that I had not other contact to go for updates on his condition. He passed away within the week, on January 15, 2021. It took me over a year to make contact with his immediate family to find out how he passed. Turned out to be sepsis and organ failure from a dirty needle. He apparently relapsed during covid times. I can only surmise from stress/ isolation. We talked and texted and Xbox live chatted whilewe played Red Dead most days about stocks, crypto, fantasy football, politics, religion, just everything really. He was working on a degree in pre-law. He was my go-to and there is still an empty hole in my life.
End of September of 2021, my oldest son, 15 at the time, told me that he was moving out to live with his mom full time. We live in the same city and have always split time with him, ever since he was around 1 year old when we fully went our separate ways. No courts, amicable by all counts. But our medically complex and homeschool lifestyle was not what my son wanted anymore. I respected his decision to be in regular high school and live a normal life like his friends. I’d tried to teach him to advocate for himself and to be his own person; it just came sooner than I realized it would. It’s still hard and happened the same week of my deceased cousin’s birthday, so the grief was amplified for a bit.
My background is in mental health, so it was interesting to experience the grief and loss process first-hand. I’d taught coping skills and helped clients process theirs in sessions, but never had the first-hand knowledge. Empathy and book skills are enough to help someone. My own losses gave me an immersive experience, which helped me understand the waves and the process of coming to terms with changes that are permanent.
Zelda BOTW will always hold a special place in my memories as the last game my son and I completed while he was still living here. Red Dead Redemption 2 on Xbox 1 will always be mine and my cousin’s true stomping grounds. My cousin is never going to text me again. Although I do think he has visited me in dreams, but maybe that will be a future post in itself. My son is never going to be my little boy living down the hall again, waiting to play games with me. He and I will likely never finish Pikmin 3, just as the younger me never finished the first Pikmin.
Life moves on. Kids grow up. People die. Priorities change. Wisdom gained, but only with a price. Grief comes and goes. Bitter at times, but sweet memories.
