I have often thought about this topic. the difference between me and my sister is 3 years and 3 months. I can't say how close we were as kids, but I have clear memories of her and I going to children's birthday parties and various friends' houses together.
Now as a parent I can see the difference between the kids. My son (age 2) has an older brother (almost 8) and I can see the difference in who has what needs. While the younger one needs attention for almost everything, the older one can now manage certain simple things on his own like feeding, dressing and hand washing. And the little guy is looking to me for everything - get this out of the way, pick me up to get that, crying, roaring, screaming, hysterics. With his daddy, those things are gone.
Maybe 2 to 4 years is the best gap in my opinion, because that way the parent has time to pay attention to every child that comes into the family.
It is important to me that each child knows he is loved, that we understand him and when he has a problem he can come and tell us without worry and we as his parents/friends will help him. If we can't, we will find someone who can.
I don't deny that sounds good to me and two babies one after the other. A friend of mine had her children two years in a row. One January 2019 and the other December 2020. Their ages are more similar and realistically almost the same needs they have.
Personally, for me, the time for kids with a small gap has passed, but I hope to have at least one more child someday ...
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I share the same thought with you about the age gap :) My sister and I were born 4 years apart then my brother and me 2 years gap. I think it is quite ideal because as you said, we can give more attention to one before another comes out :) Although I really adore parents who are able to do great even with just a year gap between their kids:)
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Giving enough time to kids to grow before giving them junior is ideal for both the parent amd the kids, everyone get a chance to feel at home before there's a plus. Plus it gives the younger ones dependable siblings that they can lean on if the parents are a little busy.
Although, some circumstances might constrain some parents from this, perhaps health conditions which would be advised they best have their kids in a closer space.
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No children for now but seeing my sister's experience, 4-5 years is the best age gap.
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