Part 3/7:
At the heart of their thesis is the idea that our relentless pursuit of approval from others leads to a cycle of disappointment and frustration. Kishimi and Koga identify two primary goals people aim for in their interactions: seeking approval or striving to make a positive impact in others' lives. Unhappy individuals often prioritize gaining approval, believing that such validation equates to being a "good" person.
Kishimi and Koga point out the paradox of this pursuit: while the desire for approval seems inherently human, it is ultimately misguided. Rather than deriving happiness from approval, individuals are often merely fulfilling deeper, unacknowledged needs that can lead to a sense of inadequacy and insecurity when others fail to validate them.