For the past 3 or 4 years, instead of making a New Year's Resolution that I know I won't follow through with, I've been setting a theme for the year a few days before it begins. This creates just a general direction I want my life to go in or something I'd like to develop over time.
The first time I did this was a theme was about the "Balance between acceptance and will". Last year's theme was "Embracing Anger", an attempt to integrate the parts of myself that I had cut off in order to prevent self destruction. I let myself fully feel rage again, for the first time in years. By now, most of the rage has cooled but I feel like I am myself again. There may be a bit more rage required to embody the theme of 2025.
2025 will be all about Removing self imposed shackles and Remembering the magic of life.
I was born full of life and with easy access to magic. I didn't know what magic was, but I could hear the voice of the trees and the waves and speak on their behalf. I felt beauty in every moment, even when I was drowning in pain.
Somewhere along the line I started worrying about what other people thought. It's not that I craved belonging, it's that I feared the opposite. I could see, better than most can, how my survival depended on acceptance to some degree. Call it ancestral trauma if you will.
I stopped embedding my behavior with the magic of play, and raw unfiltered expression, because I knew that some of the thoughts I might share would get me in trouble, seriously.
I also started to sense that no one was listening and became much more reserved about what I expressed openly. While my blog and my art became a safe place for me to express razor sharp truth and honesty, the way I started to interface with the world became reserved, restrained, and far from playful.
Too many things require thought as an adult. You have to make sure you have food, money to pay rent, you have to make sure you don't piss off your clients or your boss, or do something that offends someone who can make your life more difficult. You've got to think about your health and balance all kinds of things all while your body is undergoing a process of decomposition. Your friends get less fun, eventually they start getting sick and dying. You have more things to regret if you let yourself.
But when I wake up in the morning I still want to be able to sing songs to myself and rub my feet on the carpet and close my eyes and marvel at the magic that surrounds us in all moments. I want to be able to enjoy that without any shame, without letting myself become distracted just because most of the world around me is.
Sometimes I'll feel inspired to play in a way that might grab more attention than I'm accustomed to. That's no reason to shy away from it. Sometimes I might look crazy. That's ok. Or maybe I can keep that sense of wonder and just enjoy my 5 senses without anyone realizing that I'm praying to my own experience while riding the train or eating a sandwich. Maybe I won't answer a friend who is complaining about something they don't really want help with or maybe I will say something that is far cheesier or more cliche than I want to be, but want to say anyway because it deserves being said.
I want to stop being petty. I want to piss on that old desire to win an argument or prove anything to anyone. I hope to move people but that will be none of my concern when I'm living my life, just a vague hope that I can keep in my pocket. The only person I need to move is myself.
I will not allow old programs to override joy and wonder.
Remove from recycle bin.
Those programs may have kept alive and safe but they've also been preventing me from painting my life into the painting it is asking me to become. I reject all forms of fear. I invite all of my emotions back to me to heal, and I declare 2025 as a year when the shackles will be removed and a sense of wonder will reign supreme.
I vow to explore unconditional universal love in every single way that I am inspired to explore it, whether that's a playful smile, silent observation, a sudden burst of creativity or unfiltered rage. I will imbue all of it with the playfulness of a child.
Posted Using InLeo Alpha
Throughout most of human evolution, we depended on our tribe for survival. Now, thanks to technology, we can pretty much survive on our own. But the tendency to seek acceptance is still biologically wired into us, and requires conscious effort to overcome.
日本の景色は懐かしいよ
This created a battle in my mind, because so many people always told me "Don't give a fuck about what other people think" and it sounded cool and I wanted that freedom, but meanwhile, none of them would listen to me if I said "Don't give a fuck about what your boss thinks" :-P I'm learning to trust that if I put good out into the world, I will get enough support, and I don't need to worry too much about it.
それは日本じゃないけどね：ーP 結構似ている、飛行機で4時間かかる
Rub your feet on the carpet dude. Dont go for the moment of the year change. Just stop giving a fak and go for it.
(This comes from a 40 year old in sweatpants cuddling the dog)
Happy New year!
Happy Happy New New Year!!! This concept has worked for me these past few years! Hope you and dog had a good New Year! <3
Happy new year. Cheers to removing self imposed shackles and Remembering the magic of life
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