If you know me, you'd know I'm low key obsessed with TikTok. Mostly for the delicious recipes and fun fact videos but frankly, for the Pedro Pascal edits š There is however a trend on there that I find fascinating and it's quickly become one of my favourites. Women sharing their life knowledge with each other, passing it down from generation to generation. In a world where females are often pitted against one another, seeing something so genuine and wholesome really makes one reflect on their own journey.
There are many sayings when it comes to the different decades or stages of your life. One of my favourites, and the one that rings true to me, has to be "Your twenties are for finding yourself, your thirties are for building yourself.". The past two decades took me on a wild ride but have also blessed me with many wonderful lessons along the way. I invite you all to join me on a little self-exploring adventure through time where I delve into all the complex details of my fascinating (to me) metamorphosis.
All the various transformations within the past 20 years have shaped me into the person I am today. However I'd like to focus on three of them as they have played a fundamental role in this process.
ā¤ļø Becoming a mother ā¤ļø
I feel like this was a given. But in the grand scheme of things, it is the most substantial change I've gone (and still going) through. It stretches beyond just the physical, and it touches on every other aspect of one's life. I think Emma Stone did a great job illustrating in one sentence how a child can turn "our lives technicolor". One day you wake up and you see the world through a different lens. There's a tiny little human who, without speaking, has won over your heart in the blink of an eye. Suddenly, your purpose in life shifts from taking care of yourself to protecting your child at all costs. Your every thought revolves around them; your every action is aimed towards making them as happy and healthy as they can be. And throughout the years, they also teach you patience, kindness, understanding, unconditional love and last, but not least, they bring out the strength you never thought was in you.
So how did becoming a mother change me? I am more myself - long gone are the days of me trying to impress others, or trying to mold myself into something I'm not. I've become rather feisty, especially when it comes to my baby girl - I've learned to stand my ground and make the tough decisions when needed. But most of all, I've learned to trust the process and the universe, to be grateful for all the things I get to discover alongside my daughter, and to live in the "now" and appreciate every little moment.
Photo chosen as a huge shout out to this beautiful community š«¶š»
š Coming to Canada š
I've already shared a lot about how moving to Canada has taught me so much. I've spent 15 years here, which in itself I find fascinating, as it definitely feels like I arrived here only yesterday. Even though sometimes I get the sudden urge to flee the country and go some place warm, I will be forever grateful to have spent some of my most precious years here. It's where I first fell in love, where I experienced my first real heartbreak, where I built some of my most cherished friendships with people from all over the world. Canada is the place that gave me the escape I didn't know I needed in my early twenties. Growing up as a teen in Bulgaria, I've always dreamt of going abroad and experiencing life in another country. Thanks to our move here, I've mastered the art of being autonomous - something I don't think I'd have the privilege of doing had I stayed back home. I got introduced to many more opportunities not only professionally but also on a personal level (hello Canadian citizenship!). But most of all, I'm happy because being here taught me that letting go of some of the stereotypes and prejudice I was raised on, meant discovering a whole new world of wonder, friendships and love.
Chillin' with Miko at my old work
šø Opening up to myself and others šø
I've always been someone quiet and shy around people, especially in my teens. I don't think I ever showed my true self to anyone up until I was in my late 20s. I pretty much raised myself, emotionally speaking. Apart from my great grandma, I didn't really have anyone I could talk to or look up to when it came to emotional distress. Which is probably why it took me years before I could feel comfortable enough to reveal my essence as authentically as possible to myself, and to my friends. It also took quite a bit of therapy which I am thankful to have had access to. Understanding how specific events have affected me in the long run, how I'm pretty much a walking coping mechanism to the combination of all the trauma I've suppressed for years...It took a while getting used to. And even though I'm far from where I'd like to be, I know I've grown so much emotionally and transformed that little timid girl into someone who knows their worth is not affected by the pain they've survived.
Seeing some of my old photos is rather difficult, knowing some of the stuff that were going on in the background
Special thanks to @galenkp for the questions this week, and to the Weekend Experiences community for the great content! Wishing you all a fabulous rest of the weekend and happy Easter to all those celebrating š«¶š»š£
All photos used in this post belong to me.
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