I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately, reflecting on my actions and the kind of person I am to those around me. And if I’m being completely honest with myself—I don’t think I’m a good brother.
It’s not that I deliberately try to be distant or selfish, but when I really look at my behavior, I can’t deny that I’ve fallen short in being there for my siblings. The first thing that stands out is the little effort I put into staying in touch with them. I’m the last child of my family, and I have four older siblings. You would think that, being the youngest, I would be the one constantly reaching out, checking in on them, and making sure we stay connected. But the truth is, I hardly ever do. I don’t call them just to ask how they’re doing, what’s going on in their lives, or if they need anything. It’s not that I don’t care—I do. But my actions (or lack of them) don’t really show that.
The only times I seem to reach out are when I need something, and if I’m being brutally honest, that “something” is usually money. When I sit with that thought, it makes me uncomfortable because I know how it must look. It probably seems like I only remember them when I’m in need, and that’s not the kind of relationship I want to have with them. My siblings have their own lives, their own struggles, and their own responsibilities, yet I rarely take a moment to acknowledge that. Instead, I just assume they’ll always be there for me without considering how I can be there for them too.
I don’t want to be that kind of brother. I don’t want to be the one who only calls when there’s a problem or when my pockets are empty. I want my siblings to know that I care about them, that I appreciate them, and that I value our bond beyond financial support or favors. But then caring about someone isn’t just a feeling—it’s something that should be reflected in actions. And that’s where I need to change.
Moving forward, I know I need to do better. I need to make the effort to reach out without an agenda, to check in on their well-being, and to be genuinely interested in their lives. It might feel unnatural at first because it’s not something I’ve done regularly, but I don’t want to live with the regret of knowing I had the chance to be a better brother and didn’t take it. I love my siblings, and i think it’s time I start showing it.
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