The topic for this week is quite interesting, and I chose one that related to me and I want to write about it. Thank you @galenkp for another brainstorming topic. A cheater is difficult to confront with. I'm referring to my personal experience of being cheated by my own ex.
It is an embarrassing act to be caught cheating. Because of how many people they have hurt, cheaters get mad when they get caught. Just like how my ex was acting out when I caught him cheating on me a few times.
If you confront a cheater, they won't tell you the truth, so don't rush it. At the very beginning of our relationship, I discovered that he had cheated on me with another woman but he only told me lies about her. He had been cheating on both of us.
I am aware that his narcissistic behaviour is to blame for everything. He had treated the woman who came before me as his supply and I took her place. She had previously shared with me how she had been mistreated, and she was glad to be free of him.
Years later, I am aware of the other woman who seems to be mailing him. She was only his "friend with benefits," as he put it, when I confronted him, he said that it was just texting and he said he's not cheating. But he managed to delete some of her text before it got to my knowledge. I was devastated and knew all along that he made it a practise to stay in touch with her.
We must be aware that dealing with a cheater is difficult since they will continue to cheat as long as they can. Narcissists have a habit of cheating. They are wise, therefore, they take precautions to prevent their lies from being found out. However, they will be aggressive and in denial when we attempt to confront them about their lies.
Once a cheater, always a cheater. He’s going to play you again. I let him move on and find someone else to play with which he did now and she was the one he lied to me about. I know he needs his supply as soon as possible. A narcissist can't be left alone, he needs his supply or else he can't achieve his goal.
He can talk about his goal to his supply and let them believe that he is worth the keep. All I can say is good luck to her and I will be thankful to be away from such a man. Whatever I said in that confrontation with him in the past was useless because he would accuse me of something else, and he was the victim. I was angry, but I deserve to feel how I felt at that time.
All I can say is, my confrontation with my cheater doesn't go well and I don't really regret it. Somehow, some might feel differently. I am taken aback by our willingness to feel regret and guilt for something or someone who has treated us with no mercy. They're forgetting what transpired or why a confrontation even took place. Those who discover they have been betrayed rarely manage it well, in my experience.
Thus, I dedicate this to my cheating ex. I never had to apologise for how I responded. You did wrong; I was the one who was betrayed. Despite your initial feelings, a person who has been cheated on has no need to apologise to the cheater.
Cheat and Confrontation
Your partner cheated on you and you found out and you decide to confront your partner...how do you handle it? What are your desired outcomes? Can you find forgiveness for such betrayal?
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! help(no space) to get help on Hive. InfoIt can be an emotion-charged situation and the feeling of betrayal is terrible which also affects our reactions. It's a sad fact that these things will happen and I guess if it does people need to react in the ways that work for them.
Thanks for sharing your story.
Being betrayed by someone we love in a relationship hurts a lot. I believe that telling the truth will hurt less than lying on top of it.
I remember how I felt when I realised I had been lied to; I was so angry that my trust in him was instantly destroyed. Trust takes decades to develop, yet with just one lie, it can be destroyed in an instant.
I appreciate your feedback and the engaging subjects you brought up. Enjoy your day.
It's never a nice feeling and trust, as you say, takes so long to build and only moments to break and lose. I've not been in a situation where a partner betrayed me however I've been betrayed in other ways and it's always left me a little cautious moving forward and a little less trusting each time. People need to work really hard to gain my trust because of it, and it's incredibly easy to lose it.
Yes, the same applies to my trust in other people. Because of the pain caused by someone who cheated on me, I am extremely hesitant to make new relationships or acquaintances. My experience over the past few years has had a profound effect on me. Not only does he cheat on me, but he also abused me mentally. Thats why I felt connected to your topic,it is my actual experience and it's hard for me to forget it. I'm guarding my own self and somehow it does have pro and con.
I'm glad my topic resonated with you but didn't cause you any ill-effects due to your memories. Thanks for being involved.
No worries. That's all in the past. Sometimes when I think back about it, it traumatize me, but I know that it shall pass. I just need to handle that dark thought I had if I ever encounter him in the future. 😂😂😂
From all the story of cheater I heard, it's such a murky situation. Like you mentioned cheating might be a habit and it's definitely not easy to fix. Thanks for sharing your story. It's adding more cautionary tales for me :D
A cheater may only be forgiven with an angel's heart. I'm not as good as that, though. I put up a wall to prevent me from trusting others after the betrayal that took place.
It was undoubtedly a memorable event, and I also have little doubt that the next victim of his cheating habit will suffer the same fate.
I appreciate you taking the time to read my blog. Enjoy your day, @macchiata .