Let me take you back in time to my University days. I was quite young and naive, though young, I was the head of the class in my department, which made many people come around me. I got noticed by a lot of people and came into contact with this course-mate named Ucee, who told me that she loved how approachable and focused I was and that she would love to be my friend and also support me the best way she could, which I didn't decline.
After classes sometimes, I would visit a thrift store in front of our school that sells fancy outfits for affordable prices. I would go there to pick the ones I could afford, and then Ucee always felt embarrassed. "Amie, why do you buy bend-and-select?"(That's what we call thrift wear in my country). See from my head to toe, I am worth..." She always told me how much her clothes, hair, shoes, bag, and even phone were worth.
Ucee was a big babe. I mean, she wears the latest hair and outfits, she uses the latest phones, and I thought she came from a very rich home, so I didn't mind. I wasn't born with a silver spoon, however, I made do with what I had, since I wasn't walking around with tattered clothes, I always looked neat and smart from head to toe, even though they weren't expensive, I was very okay with my simple lifestyle.
Ucee would call me sometimes to make up for her in class, by writing down her name in the daily class attendance, which was like a test for that course, she knew I wouldn't decline because I was her friend and the class rep.
Whenever she comes to see me in my hostel after missing each class, she sometimes tips me and she shows me a lot of gifts, not for me but for herself, fancy shoes or sandals, clothes, bags, and the likes.
She kept telling me about the dudes that gifted her those things and how I too could be a benefactor if I was willing to play the game. "What game are you talking about, Ucee?" The naive me kept asking.
"You too can live largely, eat what you want, wear fancy and expensive clothes, and change your phone. Amie, you don't have to bother your parent all the time for your upkeep, and you'll even have extra money, aren't you seeing other girls on campus and how expensive and hot they look? Don't you know people measure you by these things? They know whether to regard you or discard you."
Honestly, those words were deep because I too wanted to feel among others, I wanted to be independent like some of the girls on campus and I wanted to chill "with the big girls" on campus as people accord them some sort of respect, and those fancy things were enticing no doubt, but I knew where I came from and what I wanted for myself. I come from a very cultured background, and I was taught to be content with whatever I owned so long as I owned it in a dignified manner.
One beautiful evening, Ucee called me to inform me that she had given my number to one of her friends who saw my picture on her phone and wanted us to "Roll as they do", The irritating thing about it was that this "dude" was old enough to be my "Father", Yuck!
I got pissed and told her I would never stoop so low for material gains, but she wouldn't give up on me, she felt it was because the dude was old. " Is it because he is old? I know what you want, don't worry, I'll find you a cute young guy." She teased, Hehe, would you believe that she gave out my number to another young, cute dude? Without my consent, of course.
I was at home when he called on the phone and pretended to be a coursemate who needed to submit an assignment. I hurriedly got dressed to meet up with him at the ETF hall in school, but when I saw his face, I knew he wasn't a member of our class, as I was familiar with most of the faces in class.
However, I gave him the benefit of the doubt, I stood patiently to hear the words he would utter, "I am sorry I brought you down here by this time of the day. I am Timmy, I got your number from Ucee, and I would love to..." I didn't even let him finish his damn statement because I know how Ucee can be. To her, she wanted me to up my game and meet her at her level. I guess she felt she was doing me a favor, but to me, it was disgusting to walk down that path of promiscuity just for temporal enjoyment and material things. "Save the rest, I am so not interested," I replied and gracefully walked out on him.
"What is your problem? Amie, why are you acting like a saint? It's not like it's something serious, just for the fun and to have some dough (money), if you won't up your game then we wouldn't remain friends". Ucee told me to my very face, "Worse is, you'll stop making up for me, but let me tell you, I roll with the big boys in school too, even some of the lecturers, so I have nothing to lose." She concluded.
Ucee got upset and expected me to choose that "wayward lifestyle" over "my chaste lifestyle", but I declined eventually because I knew what was ahead of that path was pain, regret, and failure, so I stuck to my path.
She stopped talking to me and started making fun of me in school, but as time went by I began to develop a thick skin to her jest and unruly behavior until I became stronger and bolder to meet with those who matched up with my standard morally and academically and who led a simple lifestyle until it seems as though Ucee never existed.
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I am glad you stood your ground and not deviate from your belief.
Thank you so much, I had to take my stand for what I believed in.
That’s great.
Wow, this was really a relatable story as this aspect of life is pretty common, i really commend our individuality and your consistency with leading a lifestyle that comfortable with you. Thanks for sharing!!
Thanks for being kind with your comment.
I'm glad you stood your ground and not allow her to belittle you. Your self esteem is commendable. Kudos to you sis. Thanks for sharing this wonderful piece.
Thanks for being thoughtful with your comment, I'm glad to share.
I really like your boldness and how you stood your ground, but I guess it wasn't easy for you then because looking at girls of nowadays ,if they could face the same thing you faced , they would surely go astray. Girls of nowadays are always in a hurry, they forget where they came from.thanks for sharing
Thank you so much for the kind words, I am glad you stopped by.
Your visually descriptive writing offers us an excellent view of your dilemma—you were faced with a friend who really didn’t understand your mindset. It’s difficult to resist peer pressure, but you stuck to your guns and held onto yourself and your beliefs.
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I supported the stories of @tomiajax and @elentiyaroberts.
Thanks for visiting.
This kind of things are rampant in higher institution, the bad and the good kids. Only few are lucky enough to withstand the temptations of the materialistic items presented. Though girls are capricious in nature, that doesn't mean you have to sell your self for things you don't have.
I wonder how she ended up her life because girls like her end up dropping out of school due to low academic grades or pregnancy or even worse in this era of rising spate in the rate of ritualism.
Pop in from #dreemport #Dreemerforlife
I hope she is alive and healthy wherever she may be.
It's so sad how many young girls have been a victim of rituals in their quest to a better life at all cost.
Well, We give Glory to God for everything. Thank you for visiting.
Hmmm all that glitters is not gold, you might do it once and destroy your future meanwhile she might get away with it
We must always be mindful of the kind of friends we keep.
#dreemerforlife
Yeah, I learned to filter my friends after that encounter. Thanks for visiting.
Bad company corrupts good manner as it is said. You shouldn't have made friends with her in the first place, people of such are out there to ruin the lives of others just as they have ruined theirs.
Thanks be to God you didn't give in even with the pressure around.. keep your standards, the price you are paying to be being decent and academically sound will not go in vain..
#dreemerforlife #dreemport
I'm glad I didn't let her influence me and I stuck with my guns that's all that matters.
Thank you for stopping by.
You are welcome 🤗
You made the right choice Ammie and people like Ucee are everywhere. I know a lady who decided to level up and she eventually became pregnant while those who initiated her did.
The funny fact might be that she was just trying to set you up out of envy for your dedication to your studies.
I am glad you resisted her temptation and focused on your studies.
came through dreemport
#dreemerforlife
Here I experience what the holy book says, train a child the way to go, when he grows he wouldn't depart from it.
I am glad I have an amazing family who constantly reminds me of the importance of being a virtuous and industrious lady.
I am also glad, I looked beyond the temporal enjoyment and oversee her setup or whatever she had in mind.
Thank you so much for your lovely feedback.
Chaste lifestyle for the win!!
A moral code of conduct is there to protect us and you're amazing to take the road less traveled by, now that's from a poem of Frost.🤭
It's supposedly how we should think ahead, we know there's hurt and regret ahead, so why would we choose to give in, right?
Cheers to moral and academic standards! ❤️😍
💛Made my way here through #dreemport. #Dreemerforlife
A chaste lifestyle is always the best lifestyle.
It is not restrictive as many people perceive it to be, it is protective and the end leads to joy and a healthy life.
Thank you so much sis for sipping by.
You are welcome and see you around ☺️
'Chilling with the big boys' is now a normal thing with girls in school and they don't see anything wrong with it. It's so bad, so bad!
It's good you didn't join.
If you had joined, we wouldn't have met you here... You would be somewhere chopping life now😂
Haha, I would have been chopping life, oh, but I do not regret my decision one bit!! I am at peace with myself and that's all that counts.
Thank you for stopping by.
Most times it's really nice to stand out... One thing that has become endemic in our society is that people always tend to follow the crowd at all times even when the said crowds are wrong.
Really loved your boldness
One thing people has got to understand is that it won't be easy at all but then it's really doable and when we end up achieving it, we become happier than we were before.
@dreemport #dreemerforlife #hhym #marathon
Thank you for your lovely feedback and for your time on my blog.
You're always welcomed
I'm glad you didn't let the pressure get to you. Friends like her aren't worth keeping, it was her loss, not yours.
Popped in from #dreemport #dreemerforlife
Sure, it wasn't my loss at all. Thank you for visiting.
That's a very good move you did, and holding up to your standard, I tell you you stand to gain more the enjoying mediate pleasure now and probably stand to suffer later...
Appreciate your strong show of resilience
Thanks for the kind words.
🍻
It is very hard to find people of the same kind especially when our kind is rare. Not everybody is willing to be pure and live a simple lifestyle. In this corrupted world, everyone is willing to give away beautiful values for materialistic gain. I can feel your pain, it is always extra hard for women. I can relate to the struggles my younger sister goes through, every single day.
Thank you for understanding how I felt and thanks for the kind comment as well.