I feel surprises are self-gratifying and for personal entertainment than it is meant for the receiver's pleasure, and enjoyment. To me, if something is being done for the receiver, consideration and consulting the receiver to ensure that whatever surprise one is planning, is appropriate.
That's just me still. I am protective of my personal space and my time. And I extend that mindfulness to others.
Yes I totally understand you. I do not think I would appreciate surprises from those not close to me as I would be very nervous that it goes very wrong. Then I could not show appreciation.