Expectations
Even before marriage we talked about it. We would have five kids like my parents had five kids. It didn't matter if they were boys or girls, but we would have five kids. My wife didn't seem to mind. She was very naive and I was very idealistic.
What I didn't realize is that kids really don't always come as humans plan. We tried from the day of our honeymoon, but we couldn't have kids. At first we didn't think much about it. Then our friends, even our friends who got married after us were having kids. We were invited to baby showers and one year birthdays, but we still were the couple with no kids.
Dissapointment
After a few years my wife and I visited a special hospital and the doctor said to me,
"You are healthy but none of your swimmers swim straight. They just go any way they want to go. You really have one in one hundred million chance of one of those getting to the place it should go."
And with his broken accent he said in English,
"I recommend you pray to the God."
This was a specialist in fertility and that's all he could come up with? More than five years passed since we were married and we knew we had to do something. We started with prayer. Just like Elisha asked for a double portion of Elijah's spirit, we asked to double our family. I was no longer asking for five kids, but any kids. Then my wife got to do some research. Her talent is her stubbornness. She can sit down for hours and study and she can never take "no" for an answer. Just around that time the government opened a program to support childless couples to try invitro.
Miracle and Celebration
Nine months later I found myself in the hospital delivery room. I was not there to visit a friend's baby. I was standing right beside my wife who was about to have our first child. For some reason the anesthesiologist was out that day and again there was not much more I could do but pray.
My son was born one month earlier than expected. He was so tiny the moment I saw him. The nurse asked me if this is my son. Then she said, "Would you like to hold him?" He was so fragile. I felt like I wasn't worthy to hold this life in my hands. I thought about the pain his mother had bringing him into the world and it came to this. He was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen and he was my son. he was not my brother or my friend's son. He was my son.
I was overwhelmed as family and friends came from all over the world to celebrate. The first to come was my wife's uncle and her aunt who had a Korean restaurant nearby. They brought a dish from their restaurant called "bin-dae-ddeuk". This is kind of like a potato pancake. The smell filled the room and much of the hallway as well. Soon my wife's parents and people from church came in to share the joy. Later my mom came in from America.
My wife was still tired and pale. She looked like she had just finished a marathon, but all was forgotten the moment she looked at our son's face. He was alive and kind of giggled. There were a lot of things to do. We had to register his birth at the embassy. We had to name him and we had to make sure he and his mother were healthy, but in all of this there was a spirit of celebration.
A couple years later my wife showed me two pink lines on a pregnancy test. Very naturally our second son was born and the celebration of the miracle of life continued. I'm not dissapointed that we don't have five kids. I treasure the lives of our children. I never felt that I was worthy to be their father and it really doesn't matter because I am their father and that in itself is something to celebrate everyday.
My oldest son is in high school and tells me stories of friends in other classes who lost their young lives. He kind of jokes about it, but lets me know that school is a lot of pressure and he needs me. I always tell him that I am glad for the fact that he is alive and he doesn't have to worry about his grades or his friends. He is always my son no matter what and I will be proud of him and celebrate whether he accomplishes something great or not.
His life itself is great.
This "celebration" writing topic comes from the inkwell's creative nonfiction writing prompt.
@tipu curate
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Reading these words of yours I confess that it made me cry... maybe because I'm about to become a father too and I'm very sensitive on the subject eh eh!
If I may express my opinion you are more than worthy to be the father of your children and you are lucky to have them but they are very lucky to have you as a father.
Yes you are right, life is great!
!PGM
Congratulations @p1k4ppa10
It's been some years now and my boys are both teenagers. I am glad to know them and listen to them. Even before they were born I would speak toward the womb and sing to them. They still want to hear their father's voice^^
Thank you!!!
I do it too, I always talk and sing to him!😍
Let's hope that Junior will also want to keep talking to me as he grows up!
!LUV
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Congratulations to your children; they have wonderful caring and grateful parents. Your swimmers may not swim straight, but your heart is, certainly, in the right place. You show the vulnerability of your soul in your effort to hide how important it became for you and your wife to conceive. Thank goodness for modern medicine and thank goodness for real people who know how to love.
Thank you for a cheerful comment. Thank you again and again for giving me the nudge to write. I know my response took awhile, but yes... I have a lot to be thankful for. The struggle of being childless for so long is another story. Mother's Day is soon and it's time for me and the kids to show some appreciation. !LUV
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I totally feel you man. We have a girl back then, and think it's about time to add one more. No matter how hard we tried, nothing seemed to happen until the girl turned 4. We think "that's it" and donated all the baby stuff. By 5th year, we're on the shopping spree again 🤣🤣🤣
Awwwww this is so nice, congratulations to you guys😃
Thanks for sharing @davidke20
Many times it's when we totally give up trying, that's when we get what we wanted. !LUV
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Hello @mineopoly this really got to me, especially the beginning part of your story and some tears had to drop😥 I get really touchy when topic like pregnancies and childbirth are brought up because I am a bit tokophobic.
Saying i understood what you and your wife went through would mean i am lying, I know it was hard for you guys but I am happy you both scaled through. At this point can i still say congratulations? because you both deserves all the congratulations in this world.
Thanks for sharing
!LUV
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Thanks for sharing @ibbtammy
We are human so I can understand the fear, but the blessing and joy of life is worth it. I don't know each person's story. We tried for seven years and at the right time we were blessed. The medical treatment can be very difficult and I can understand not wanting to do it especially if it failed once. It was the hormone treatment that was the most difficult actually. It seems that life giving requires some sort of life sacrifice. The fact that our kids are alive and healthy is something to celebrate and even though some years have passed, I deeply accept your congratulations ❤️.
!LUV
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What a beautiful love story! There is nothing impossible for God, your family has been greatly blessed and I hope they continue to be. You seem to be a great father, I see your humility and how beautiful your relationship is with your wife and children. May God continue to perform miracles in your lives.
Wow @aiuna
You opened my eyes to see that this is a love story. Love is something worth celebrating and we thank God for this love. We never can understand how things work out in the end, but hope and love endure.
!LUV
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Doble celebración, que bueno que Dios les concedió el milagro de ser padres, saludos!
Gracious @inessita
It is a blessing for me.
Another wonderful story! I haven't been on Hive much, but Daniel mentioned you today when we were talking and I thought I would check out some of your posts!
Hahaha,
I'm really tired these days working on a translation of a Korean missionary biography with my wife. We have just one page left and then a final check. This doesn't give me much extra time to create. But from tomorrow it should be better.
I'm glad Daniel posted a lot on Youtube. If I miss him I can listen to a poem. I've known him through the blog for five years and he is very unique and talented. His strength is he is good at many things and his weakness is that he doesn't seem to know what to focus on.
I love to create but have been busy. If I could create I would make very short videos about language that are funny and spiritually uplifting and somehow require a totally physical response.
It was nice to hear from you. I'm glad you tried new things and I'm inspired by the yoga and gardening. In the end it all works out.^^
it's so crazy that I met you on these blogs(Steemit first) thru Daniel. The exciting news is that Daniel is now concentrating on building a business filming for companies with his drone. It literally is about to take off! I have been concentrating my prayers on him making his first $$ this month - June. Hope you are well. My husband and I went on the most amazing 2-week trip to Greece. I need to post on Hive about it and maybe on my Instagram. Hope you and your family are all doing well!
I'm glad you made it to Greece and back @violetmed,
Daniel is good at the drone, but he is good at so many things. I'm glad he found one thing to concentrate on. That's not easy to do.
It's great you can visit Greece. My parents don't travel any more. I can't even get them to Hawaii.
Keep in touch and have a good weekend.
I've been busy at work. Today I had thirty three college students visit my class. This is their first practicum. After lunch I am responsible for meeting with them again. I need hope to speak with them. They are giving their college years to prepare for a job in teaching in the country with the lowest birthrate and highest suicide rate. What can I say to them?
Oh my, so sorry to hear about that. Seriously South Korea has the lowest birthrate and highest suicide rate? As you can see I'm not posting much on Hive. Even though that was 2 weeks ago I will pray for you and those college students to have a positively affect any students that they work with. Funny that you mention Hawaii - we still want to travel there someday! Also Alaska! Oh and another thing we had a couple on our Greece trip that were both 80! They were missionaries for 15 years in Africa, so they have traveled extensively! They climbed many, many stairs along with our entire group. It was amazing to watch them and I hope to still be going on those kinds of adventures when I'm 80! :) Take care!
Thank you for the smile and hope.