This is a fantastic story and I'm glad you figured out how to post it with us at the ink well.
What I particular love is the way you get into the head of Lois and that slightly self centered way she seems to view people. I've known many people like that who are good deep down, but view people based on status or what they can give them. I dunno, you might completely disagree with my estimation of her character.
She realized how hard it must have been. The things he must have seen. But he was home now. He had to move on. It was bad enough a whole chunk of time had been taken from them. How did it help to mope?
This is what clinched it for how I felt about the character of Lois. It is complex with her need for kids etc, but something about her just gets my goat. For example here, it's completely obvious Sam is going through PTSD, believe me I recognize the signs.
But she is more interested in her wants and needs.
It's a sign of a great character writer when they can elicit such feelings in the reader.
Thanks for sharing this with us at the ink well. It's a story I'm going to come back to for a second read tomorrow before I write my own entry for the prompt/challenge 🙂
Thank you, Raj! I really appreciate your critique and your positive review :)
I don't disagree with you. When I first conceived of this character, she was completely shallow. But that didn't give her room for growth. There was no 'arc'. I realized that she had to be more complex than that.
Lois certainly seems to lack self-awareness, and empathy. And yet, I hope we leave the story with some sympathy for her.
I thought of this character long ago, but could never put her down on paper properly. Your prompt helped me to focus on a 'bad habit'. From her isolation (self-imposed?) grew deliberate tardiness. A way to separate.
So, thank you for the prompt. You brought Lois to life.
Can't wait to read your story.
(Right now I'm looking up pictures of the double helix for my next science blog...another one of the several hats I wear on the blockchain. I do love this place.)
Be well and of course, continue to create :)
Regards,
AG