creating a story arc, and have a look at the tip about editing your work before submitting your post.I would really like to see you develop your writing @hillarypowers, rather than posting small pieces each day. This is a good opener for a story and could develop into a very good story arc. Please read the writing tip about
here and here? Have you thought about entering the Challenge yourself? It would help you to improve your writing.Have you read the reviews for this week's Challenge by @oredebby and @marcybetancourt