Having read this interesting and creative piece, we are left with many questions as a reader: If the red alert has been sounded for the first time in ten years, why was the doctor walking casually to the patient's bed with no sense of urgency, even taking time to look at other patients and his notes along the way? This feels odd, is not explained, and therefore does not fit the narrative well. We discover that they are harvesting psychic energy from volunteers on Mars but there is no context provided for this... Why psychic energy? What are they going to use it for? Why are they on Mars? You have some interesting elements here but the story needs more development to draw the reader in, to help the reader to identify with and be invested in the characters, and to provide a satisfactory story arc. It needed to be longer for the number of interesting angles you introduced as they all required space to breathe and to be developed and explored :-)
Thank you for writing in The Ink Well.
That's correct I've never thought about it that way and wrote is one like a trailer for a movie 😭😁 These questions will be answered if you watch full movie 😁😄😁 I will be more careful and explain these kind of details next time because I know you don't like ongoing -part- stories 🤗🙏
Yes please do share the full length feature next time 😂 your readers will appreciate it! You have some really interesting and creative story ideas. We look forward to reading your next one.