Your story is so unique and interesting, @jemima1996. We love it when writers come up with original ideas like this one!
One tip for you: We would love to see more dialogue in a story like this. For example, she could talk to people on the street, and to the scientists. We have a great article on integrating action, dialogue and narrative in a story, and another one on how to write dialogue in our catalog of fiction writing tips.
Thank you for sharing your story in The Ink Well, and for reading and commenting on the work of other community members.