Guy's Night Chapter IX: Wait a Minute...

in Tabletop / DND2 years ago

Ok so, Guys Night is about a d20 Modern game I played in after changing cities and wanting to get back into TTRPGs. It is told as best as I can recall, since it was over 10 years ago.

Table of Contents

Chapter I: In the Beginning
Chapter II: Genesis
Chapter III: Enter the Mullet
Chapter IV: It's the End of the World as we Know It
Chapter V: You Can Fight City Hall
Chapter VI: From the Ashes
Chapter VII: New World, Old Problems
Chapter VIII: Finally, a Cave

Okay, Where Were We?

Oh, that's right, two grown men and their PCs fighting over a belt like children with a stuffed animal. So all that week I had been trying to figure out how to politely yet firmly demand the belt. So the next session rolls around and Seth and I resume our stance pretending to hold the belt. And I do the simplest thing I can think of. Mullet looks Maurice dead in the eyes and says,

"Please."

Maurice seems taken aback, then chuckles and says, "Sure Kid, I was only joking." We both know he wasn't, but interparty crisis has been averted. Derek and McDougal have been scouting the around the cave while this was going on and find a tunnel leading deeper. We regroup, come up with a marching order and proceed to explore the caves and tunnels.

So this next part I don't really remember that well. Mostly be cause it was a long and grindy fight with something like 40 Kobolds. Because of the number of combatants, the fact the combat was happening at multiple different parts of the cave and tunnel system, and it was more or less a running gunfight, it took about 3 hours to finish. This is probably why I don't remember much, as I was just dropping 3 Kobolds a turn thanks to the new belt.

The New Hotness

OH RIGHT! I forgot to tell you about the belt. So I get the belt and Mullet puts it on, and it sizes to fit me. Yep, magic belt, like there was any doubt. Dan tells me, "You feel lighter." Now for about 10 minutes I'm trying to figure out what that means. So I'm jumping around trying to fly, and yeah the jumping is easier but not flying. Once Dan has gotten his amusement out of me making an ass out of my character, he lets me know its a Belt of Giants Strength.

Rock on, this belt is giving Mullet a +4 bonus to strength. Mechanically it gave me a +2 to hit and +3 to damage. For those who need a refresher, this was the pre-belt Power Attack combat bonuses:

+7/+2 to hit, 2d6+13 (Magic/Slashing), Crit 17-20 x2

and the now the new:

+9/+4 to hit, 2d6+16 (Magic/Slashing), Crit 17-20 x2

Doesn't look like much but it is a +10% to hit and +20% to minimum damage, so I'm pretty happy. Back to the Kobolds. So the fight ends and we find a fairly large cave with only one exit that is basically only big enough for a medium sized creature to fit through comfortably. Now I don't want anybody going near that other door till we have a moment to catch our breath.

Due to the grindy nature of the last fight, I want to say two of our party members were pretty wounded. So "Doc" Ron starts doing his thing, all band-aids and stiches. One of them need Surgery which was a long fix, like 4 hours. I think Mullet was the only one who came out of the Kobolds mostly intact, a rare occurrence these days.

Well Maurice and Derek have a few scraps and cuts but are mostly fine. Since we hadn't been attacked in almost two hours, they figured we cleared out all the threats. That's when Maurice and Derek decide to check out the man sized exit, since this room is tragically bereft of loot. The exit lead to a straight tunnel about 30 feet long. At the other end?

TREASURE!

Piles of Gold, Jewels and Loot! And what's that on top of one of the these loot piles? Was it a large ornate shield, with slot just the right size for the Diamond Heart of Life™? Why yes it is.

We had done it! The quest was over! Maurice and Derek call Mullet over to the door and he looks in. And all he sees is a Large Triangular head with burning red eyes at the end of the tunnel.

In hindsight all the signs were there. The burnt sand at the entrance, the kobolds, the treasure hoard. We were in a dragon's lair. We killed its guards. We killed its servants. And those two idiots had just announced that there was more loot than we could carry. Within earshot of the dragon.

The ADULT... RED... DRAGON...

And my only thought was... Well, what character should I roll up next. While this is not where the session ended, it is where I'm going to stop for today. I know its been a while. I'm trying to get my writing groove back. So please bear with me while I get things going again. Thanks for reading, until next time.

Victory by Dice!

TL;DR: It's mostly just the setup for Chapter 10, but I think the end bit is funny.

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