One doesn't get ahead by hoping that others fail... Well, that is an unhealthy way to live!
Absolutely agree with this. Also, judging your college, you are not becoming better.
Many times we see people comparing themselves with others that did not achieve great results, so they could shine more. But it is not the way to go.
Hahaha, I understand that you don't like talking about the performance once it is done. Maybe it is good just in a constructive way, to improve some things next time. I have a friend who is a pianist. We don't attend each other's concerts or performances as an audience, it's like an internal agreement 😂