Where do I begin?
The last several weeks have been socially busy. I spent time with my youngest sister who flew for a visit and a very dear overseas friend whom I hadn't seen for 7 years. There are relationships that through time fade like furniture that had been constantly exposed to the sun but there are those that regardless of time, distance and absence remain the same.
Week 7's topic is about Personal Belongings. I will be answering the Option 2 question: What are some of your struggles and dilemmas in letting go of your personal belongings? and how have relationships allowed me to face that struggle head-on.
I had an artist phase before my daughter arrived in our life where I spent weekends in DUCTAC (Dubai Community & Arts Centre) studio painting in oil with other fellow art lovers. The guest bedroom in our apartment villa turned into a studio and during a year of hiatus and soul searching, I spent a lot of my time locked in that room painting.
For many years I have amassed several artworks and we took them with us in the 20 ft container when we moved to the Philippines. I value each of those paintings. A part of me seemed to have been captured within each stroke on those canvases like babies that one had nurtured and cared for. Hence, I had grown attached to most of them especially the ones that had significant memories.
They have been mostly hidden away while we were living in Dubail until I started displaying some of my favorites in the houses we moved into in the Philippines.
Love & Hate Relationship with Art
I have a love and hate relationship with art but I couldn't bring myself to let go of personal artworks and art materials.
The hate relationship resurfaces with the memory of being thrown out of the house after declining to draw real scaled horses for a glass partition due to a lack of creative mood. Moreover, there is a sense of restlessness when I couldn't get an art right which resulted in many unfinished works.
On the lighter side, there were days when the freedom of creativity in a supportive space provided healing. This is the ardent reason I hold on to the art materials and artworks. My daughter turned out to be enthused with art, more than I, so I bequeathed most of my art materials to her and continue to teach her everything that I know.
The Importance of Letting Go
The paintings were all stored in the hangar when we moved to a tiny apartment. A hangar that was destroyed by Typhoon Odette. The helpful wrapping of paper, bubble plastic, and carton that I learned from the professional movers saved them from the flood.
The aftermath drew a question, "Would the paintings be better off somewhere else than locked away in a storage?"
Here are 2 paintings of my niece and nephew which will most likely go to my parents-in-law's home when we visit France. I blogged about the process of this on Hive once here.
Years ago, I received a few private messages from close friends who asked to buy the paintings. I wasn't ready to part ways with the ones they wanted at the time because they were displayed in our home.
These friends were the ones who had encouraged me most when I moved back to the Philippines. They had been tremendously supportive when I was struggling and adjusting to our life here. Even though we don't talk as often as we'd like, conversations rekindle the friendship that has always been there.
In a light bulb moment, I called them to ask if their interest in the paintings is still there. They happily texted me their mailing addresses and within a short time, three artworks had been sent to different destinations as gifts.
One displayed the tea painting next to her desk inside her bedroom suite in Ayala Alabang, while the other was in another friend's family hall in Cagayan de Oro. The Wife, an old woman painting was adopted by an artist friend in Manila.
It felt light and joyful to see them leave the nest.
As creatives, we get attached to our works, our tools, and our materials. I guess the problem lies with the word "our" or "my." This was and at some point remains to be a difficult thing to let go of. For one, the art materials are expensive and even though the paintings I had done felt more like experiments, I had grown attached to them.
Hearing my friends' appreciation triumphs over the feeling of holding on to these pieces locked up somewhere. The flooded floors of the hangar taught me that these pieces mean nothing unless I let them go. This simple act reminds me of the value of flow. It is the process of making them that is more important than the end product.
Do you have art pieces that you value at home and will never let go of?
How do you feel about letting go of your work?
What is that thing you own that you find hard to part ways with?
Thank you for reading and sharing these art reflections with me.
All photos are taken by the author. The cover image and collage were edited with Canva
"I am an old soul who simply loves coffee, who finds joy and beauty in both tangible and the unseen."
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Oh! I'm a collector as well! 😀 I did collects the artwork from my daughter and just everywhere in my house too. 😅 I was envious of your determination!
Thank you @shinecrystalline. Aren't the children inspiring? When the kids are totally lost in the flow when they're making something regardless of the outcome is admirable. An artist friend advised me to draw with them for fun. I bet you have one hanging on your fridge too?
Mostly all of her artwork is painting and some are ceramic handicrafts. And yes, it is! It doesn't matter whether their artwork looks good or not, it is important to make sure that children are using their imagination. And I'm really bad with any kind of drawing or painting. 😀 So I'm just a generous sponsor who bought and supply her equipment hahah. 😅
Haha, yes to being a generous sponsor, and may we continuously have the strength to clear all of the clutter afterward 😄 Happy weekend ahead!
It's nice that you gave the paintings away to friends. It's great that they ended up in good homes and maybe even places that you will see them again.
I don't have any art pieces that I created that I wouldn't give away. My art isn't that good though haha
Hi @leaky20, I'm glad they took them in. I guess it's my own way of showing gratitude for their friendship all these years.
Is there something that you own, a material thing right now that will be very difficult to ever let go of?
I'm sure that there is but I can't think of anything specific at the moment. There are probably many things. I often find it hard to get rid of stuff. Photos would be a big one for sure.
Oh yeah, sorting and decluttering digital photos is one continuous task. They tend to accumulate. Just the thought of sorting the mobile phone's photo gallery makes my head spin. I do like sharing them with friends and family privately (photos when said family and friends are in there) so that when I accidentally lose them like a hard drive malfunction, I know there's still a copy somewhere.
Hello Arni,
I do recall the paintings of your niece and nephew, and remember how realistic the little details of it were.
I understand the attachment and difficulty in letting go of your personal art, especially having taken it up actively while soul-searching. Each stroke holds a personal memory and emotion, yet you found the power to let them go. Kudos to you. As I've seen mentioned in the comment, at least it's to your dear friends.
I do hope that you'll be able to keep the tools for mini you, as I have no doubt that she'll continue on your creative part (most likely in fashion 😁).
I've come a long way. When I look around me, there is nothing that I would have difficulty letting go of, except a few pieces of jewellery from my dear friend who's no longer with me. My real test will be when I go back to Jamaica and see what I left back in storage. I have a feeling that I'm gonna leave my bedroom empty.
Hi Camille, the upside to it as mentioned by Leaky is being able to see them again during visits. Anais and her friends are heavily using the aquarelle and the colored pencils.
Speaking of fashion, Anais took the muslin cheesecloth that I use for cooking to make clothes. I found her trying to watch youtube to learn patterns. She cried when I couldn't teach her how to actually make dresses. I told her there's a process to that and it takes time and skill to learn. She stitched them by hand but she got frustrated when she couldn't put them on because there were no buttons 😁
Sorting out stuff back home could be daunting. Are they all in one place?
Oh no! I hope Anaïs will continue to enjoy her dressmaking. I did the same till I purchased my first heavy-duty Singer machine. A very heavy one. Hand stitching is nice too, and fashion is so advanced that you no longer need to hem the edges of everything. Youtube heh? That's advanced initiative 😁
Yes, the majority of the stuff is at my mum's house. Anything I have in storage with my girlfriend have eluded my memory so I no longer count them. There's really no point in keep all those things. I do have a little diary left in Jamaica, that I would love to go back and read my personal letters to myself, to see how much I ave changed, and which goals and aspirations became real, and which ones I'll think WTF? My mum messaged me recently to ask me if I needed her to go through any of my logs for her to scan for me...I quickly told her not at all 🤣
Oh my, diaries left behind should be retrieved. I hope you hid them well haha. Teenage rants and venting out filled mine and my Mom read them when she decluttered. Yearbook messages would have been nice to re-visit again as well.
My mum is very noisy, so I'm sure she probably read them 😆
Yeah, a yearbook would be nice. However, I have no recollection of where I know a lot of persons on my FB friends. People grow and look completely different 🤣 and it's years that I haven't seen many of them.
What is it with nosy Moms? 😄 Maybe I'll be one to Anais who knows 🙈
Oh yes, everyone turned out to be different as we all aged and grew. Do you still remember how you looked in the school yearbook photo? And did you have that small description there of what you were like back then?
The one that I was able to salvage was a small notebook with messages from former classmates with wishes and their thoughts. Although we don't have contact with most of them anymore, it offers a glimpse of ourselves way back.
No, I don't think I have a yearbook. I recall a yearbook for my eldest sister, and I don't think the school got around to doing mine. It will be interesting what I find though. So many have passed away, even in recent years, that it might be an emotional experience revisiting those things.
I am in contact with only 2 former classmates and we communicate every few years.
I do like to read the wishes in cards from my former work colleagues though. They knew me well and accepted me for who I was, so their messages were real and reflected the authentic me then:)
I soooo feel you @discoveringarni 😊 I have artworks around. Some I displayed on the walls some are still wrapped up. They all tell a story, moments from that time, emotions I felt.
Some are for sale, but will I let them go when a buyer comes.
Of course I sold many over the years or even gifted some.
You do leave something from yourself in them… it is hard to say goodbye sometimes.
So good of you that you could let go of those 3 and they are displayed in the new owners house. I do love it when they do send a photo from where the artwork “lives”
Happy Friday to you 👋🏻☀️
Hi Jackie, I thought about you because this is definitely something you encounter and have experienced a lot.
Yes indeed! I was so happy to see the photos. Wishing you a happy weekend ahead!
Thanks for that @discoveringarni 🤗🥰
Yes, so many similarities we have…
Thank you kindly, have a wonderful and sunny weekend as well 👋🏻☀️
I won't let it go in the first place.
Haha great answer, it made me smile 😊
Beautiful artworks! Hope you can continue.
Probably you can also commission/sell/gift it, so in the next generations, they can still admire it in their walls or in museums—like Michelangelo, Monet and other painters 😅
Hi Loy, thank you and I hope I can continue painting. I still have unfinished work that needs to be completed yesterday. I'd need to finish eating sacks of rice for many centuries to be able to do that haha.
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