Life and mental clutter

Sometimes I take a pause and think deeply, comparing my thoughts with this particular question: “Is everyone passing through what most of us are passing through in life?” This question stems from the fact that life is really hard, yet it somehow appears very simple for some people out there.

As much as I'm trying my best to live freely, away from all the burdens of life, the truth is that my mind still gets cluttered with a lot of thoughts as life unfolds. If I had the chance to erase one thing completely from my life, it would be the constant mental clutter. As funny as this may sound, I sometimes wish it were possible to remove my brain just to allow my life to operate freely without having to rack it with bugging thoughts all the time. But then, if that were done, how would I live? The brain is what pushes some cells to function. Lol😂

I’m someone who's easily emotionally disturbed whenever I hear that a loved one is severely sick, especially in instances where I can't render help or travel to meet the situation. No matter how hard I try to wave off such thoughts and convince myself that “it’s just a sickness,” they don’t go away that easily. My mind always runs through a series of thoughts, moving back and forth, praying to God to ensure that nothing escalates beyond that. I’m more scared of death when it happens to a loved one than when it concerns me.

I remember some years ago when I was called and informed that my mom had an accident on her bike while going to the farm. Photos were sent to me, showing how she was hospitalized and how the fire from the exhaust burned her arm. Mehn, my mind knew no freedom during that period—I was full of thoughts. The worst part was that I was in school then, and I couldn't travel home to meet the situation. To make matters worse, I was also dealing with school and financial struggles at the time. Life was just against me, and all I could do was think, think, and think. Yes, I tried adopting habits like meditation with positivity in mind, mingling with friends, listening to music, and so on, but my mind knew the weight of the challenge it was facing then. None of those remedies could truly ease the situation or give me the freedom I desperately needed.

This mental clutter, which happens regularly (though not excessively), is something I would completely erase from my life if I could. But it appears so difficult to do away with, especially considering that life is full of ups and downs. It never smiles continuously on someone—it smiles today, and the next day, it brings a reason for one to wonder if they have offended it.

But it’s fine too. A minimalist lifestyle has been helping me reduce these life-bugging thoughts to a minimal level. As I improve in it, I gradually learn to give less attention to these overwhelming thoughts.

Thanks for reading.

This is my entry to #KISS writing prompt.

Photos used are mine