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What do you call a guy who’s had too much to drink?
A cab.

Credit: marshmellowman
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(7/8)@lorddiablo, I sent you an on behalf of @henruc

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My roommate keeps saying that our house is haunted.
But I've lived here for last 216 years, and haven't heard anything unusual.

Credit: reddit
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(1/8)@henruc, I sent you an on behalf of @lorddiablo