It's just a coincidence, I swear, that I'm posting my second rant for the week. I don't know quite how it happened. I'm in pretty good spirits, really, even if I told a guy who lowballed me a $600 offer on a board that costs $2000 new to get ..............'ed today.
Ah, local Facebook community groups. A great way to advertise services, find out what's going on, sell stuff, and connect with ours. It's also a great place to popcorn observe comments and discussion when someone comes on to vent about something they're unhappy with. This morning, it was a woman angrily venting about her neighbor mowing the lawn at 7 a.m. It's the weekend, for goodness sakes, she argued. It wasn’t just the timing that bothered her, though that alone seemed inconsiderate. Even council regulations clearly state no mowing before 9 a.m. on Sundays. What really had upset her was that she worked so hard all week, looking forward to just one morning to sleep in, only to be rudely awakened by the roar of a mower by a guy who didn’t seem to care about their neighbours. All week, she said, she’d been listening to his dog bark incessantly. She was clearly at the end of her rope - enough to post online about it, which clearly isn’t the most effective strategy, but let’s not go there.
Here's a nice picture of some lichen to calm things down a bit. Fairies use noiseless mowers to keep it under control.
It’s not the first time I’ve seen something like this. People’s patience gets tested all the time by the small, thoughtless actions of others - the woman at the beach letting her dog off lead and not having any recall at all when it approached - and bit - a seal, or the dog poo bags left dangling on fences, or people parked in carparks at the beach leaving their engine running and the music going whilst other people are trying to enjoy the serenity, or people talking loudly on their phones in cafes. What’s fascinating—and frustrating—is how sharp the divide is between those who seem to care about the impact they have on others, and those who act like they’re the only ones who matter.
The neighbour who mowed their lawn early retaliated quite angrily on her post. “Why should he care?” he retorted. “There’s worse things to worry about”. He’s not wrong - but that misses the point. “She should be up by 8 anyway” he continued. Others chimed in. How would he like it, they argued, if he’d needed some peace and quiet? Why shouldn’t he wait just another hour or two till 9 am? What’s wrong with him that he couldn’t be more considerate of his neighbours? Eventually the post was taken down. Some neighbours just couldn’t care less.
Take our rural street. Michelle, four doors down, has to put up with the neighbours who incinerate burning nappies and whose dog runs under her fence to attack her horses. They’re the same once who’ve been letting their 5 year old grandson burn up and down the road on a tiny dirt bike all afternoon. The noise is relentless, cutting through the peaceful afternoon like a chainsaw. Sure, kids need to play and burn off energy, but the constant racket meant I couldn’t sit outside and read a book. The thought that they might consider how their fun affects others seems entirely absent.
It’s the same on camping trips. You find the perfect spot in this beautiful national park, set up, listen to the birds, the campfire crackle, the trees in the wind. Next minute, some dickheads set up and blast music loud enough for the entire campground to hear. I get it. People want to let loose and have fun. But for goodness sake, go do it somewhere where other people aren’t. It’s not just an annoyance, it’s a complete disruption of the natural serenity that people have come to enjoy. And I’ve read the posts about it - again, two kinds of people. The ones who think it’s unreasonable, and the ones that won’t be told what to do, and think people should lighten up, because it’s just a bit of harmless fun, and why don’t you fuck off?
The considerate ones ask themselves, “Will this bother someone? Could this disrupt their peace?”. They’re polite and ask if it’s okay to play quiet music for an hour or so, or if it’s okay they park close to you. Like me, the aren’t perfect, but they at least try to find a balance between their needs and the needs of others. We wouldn’t dream of starting a power tool, for example, before 10 am on a weekend let alone a weekday.
Aaah, how's the serenity?
For others, it’s either utter oblivion, or more likely, utter indifference. I’m sure they’re thinking that "It’s my right to mow my lawn when I want." or, as I’m sure some of you will write in the comments: "Kids will be kids; let them ride the bike." Or, "If I want to play my music loud, that’s my choice." What’s missing is the recognition that you are removing other people’s right to peace and quiet in shared spaces like neighborhoods and campgrounds. What’s missing is empathy and care for your fellow human beings.
When people act kindly and considerately, it creates goodwill. A neighbor who might otherwise be irritated by a little extra noise will likely shrug it off if they know you’ve made an effort to be respectful - for example, not starting the mower til 9 or letting you know that they’ll play a bit of quiet music but turn it off by 9. Inconsiderate, blind behaviour that doesn’t take into account others creates unnecessary tension in a world that’s already tense enough.
Ssssh, said the waterfall. I'm busy whsssshing.
Before you retaliate, saying I’m being petty, I’m not actually saying we should tippy toe around others, constantly being worried about offending someone. I guess all I’m asking for is a little awareness. If your activity is going to be noisy and disruptive, imagine the impact on those around you. Just because it might not bother you isn’t really an excuse, Facebook guy. Just because you wake up at 6 am, doesn’t mean that your neighbour doesn’t deserve to listen to the birds and wake up a little more gently on a Sunday morning. A little basic courtesy goes a really long way. It’s not even about grand gestures - it’s just the little every day choices that can create connections and community or totally destroy it.
All these petty complaints are small in the grand scheme of things, I suppose. Worse things are happening in the world than someone not picking up after their dog. But then all the little things add up, don’t they? When we don’t care about others, what kind of world are we creating? Surely we want to live in a world where people care about one another?
With Love,
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There is no better way to begin the week than with a good rant! 😃 I tried to explain many times the behavior of people who "just don't care" about anyone but them... But, that's impossible to do... I suppose that the only explanation is a lack of empathy and the rise of egoism... Self-care, self-growth, and "you should take care of yourself" are promoted heavily, and with a reason... The problem is that many people misunderstood that message, and understood it "Me, before the others!"
I remember my father killing me on the weekends when I was a teenager... He would always find something to work on Sunday morning at 6-7 AM!!! Was that a call for attention, or just to piss us off, I don't know... lol...
But, I have a funny anecdote from a couple of days ago... Recently, we moved to another apartment and a completely new city, new neighbors, etc. We were a bit worried about how the neighbors would turn out, but it looks like they are decent and nice... But...
As we just moved in, we are doing a lot of things around the home... Moving stuff (living in an apartment building on the last floor, but we do have neighbors under us), fixing things, etc. One evening, I didn't pay attention to time, I was sorting cables, trying to fix them to the wall, working with a small hammer... My neighbor knocked on the door asking for a bit of silence as it was 10 PM, and her children couldn't sleep!! 🤦
So, there we are... We are now "those freaks" in the building who make noises at inappropriate times... 😂 🤣 (So, I'm the guy mowing the lawn from your story... lol...)
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Hahah oops! But I bet you apologised and stopped making a noise! I bet you didn't get super defensive and tell her it was your RIGHT to make anoise whenever you wanted!
Hah I think that's just parents. My Dad used to hose my window when he was watering on the weekend - I live in Australia, so summer is hot and dry - I still remember the noise. I'd scream 'DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAD'. He definitely just wanted me to get up so he could talk to me or something. Bless him.
Well, that's true... I did apologize and stopped making noise... On the other side, hearing children running in the apartment all day today, maybe I will not next time... 😂
And that's how crazy shit gets, right? Because we are all after payback 🤣🤣 How on earth we havent blown each other up get I don't know..
🤣🤣🤣
There are some people who care about me and I and others who care about we and us, I consider myself to be in the latter category. Not mowing before the time on a quiet Sunday morning seems like one of those things that shouldn't need to be said, right? But here we are, with others who show no consideration for anyone but themselves.
I wrote a blog post once about two little kids who were plucking the green leaves off off of a short, young, tree. The parent did nothing but watch and smile when I asked her if she was going to do something about it, and it was up to me to explain to her kids that trees provide the oxygen that we breathe, and if they kept pulling the leaves off the tree would die, and eventually , so would we.
They stopped.
Another time I was on my lunch break at Walmart reading a book in a quiet little corner. A woman came over to my little nook and started talking loudly on her phone interrupting my reverie. She ignored my requests to let me enjoy my peace, so I took hers away. I got up and began shouting nonsense into her phone while she was trying to talk telling her "now you know how I feel"
She got irritated and left, which is exactly what I wanted.
Your rant is an example of what considerate people like us go through on a daily base as well. All of these little scenarios add up and compound over time. This is why I have reduced my circle to people like me who give a damn about others and try to lighten the load wherever we go. There are people who care about me and I and others who care about we and us, and I'm glad you're one of them.
Hah great trick with the woman on the phone, I don't know if I'd be brave enough! Plus my English husband, who is far too polite, would have held me back.
Aw, shucks. And you. Have a wonderful Christmas, however you spend it. x
Oh and
two little kids who were plucking the green leaves
I feel the third rant of the week brewing....
They live everywhere unfortunately @riverflows!
It's like those pesky flies or mosquitos, one will always find its way into my room!
As for playing loud music in nature, well that is sacrilege!
Our neighborhood group chats are filled with valid complaints, some not, and quite entertaining. I mostly am a spectator but if I open my mouth, which is rare, I end up in hot water.
How are you doing?
Sometimes a wise woman just watches the shit show and shrugs, right?
I'm good. Had a bit of a cry this morning thinking of Dad, but it passed soon enough. Usual life stuff. Generally good though! Hope you are doing same xx
The tears come from nowhere, but need to come out! Our 50th anniversary is coming up on the 21st, been feeling very sorry for myself because I've had some scary incidents, likely a pinched nerve, neck-related, seeing an orthopedic tomorrow.
Life thankfully still overflows with good stuff.
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I don't sweat the small stuff, and I sure don't post about these things on FB. That was her big mistake, and will cause her neighbor to do these things more often to her. She likes to complain about her neighbors, publicly, and he likes to annoy them. This sitch just got much worse.
Yes, I too try to be considerate. Now and then, I need to release somehow, to let the kid ride up and down the street on his dirtbike so I can make a few calls or have a good cry, to mow early cuz I have to visit someone in the hospital, to play music loudly to drown out sorrow. We also must be more understanding of the why someone might seem to be acting inconsiderately. And to politely and privately point out to them how their actions have affected us.
There is no hope whatsoever for the music blaring idiots at the beach. Boy do they ever piss me off.
Sounds like quite the drama unfolding in the local Facebook group.
It's always interesting to see how people use those spaces to vent or connect with others.
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BEER.I think we are in a weird spot right now - with the one hand there being a need to have the freedom to stretch themselves a bit and on the other hand the need to be considerate of others. I think we also live far too closely to each other than we need to. Not that having a neighbor an acre away would do that much to eliminate the lawn mower noise but it would reduce it a bit..
I think sadly there’s so many variables at play and so much of it is just fighting. Perhaps the neighbor just got in a fight with his wife and needed to blow off some steam. Perhaps it’s his coping mechanism. Too many variables lol.
I do know that we need to find better boundaries but also have to be careful that we don’t turn into a bunch of pussies. The people who scream at any inconvenience are in far greater supply than ever before and that’s also dangerous because almost everything sets them off.
Regardless though, some communication is always nice and helpful! Don’t know how the lawn mower would’ve resolved with communication but certainly camping and other places a quick hello and check goes a long way!
I'm not sure that it's space from each other we need. People used to live in tribes after all. We just need to be considerate and raise our kids to be considerate.
Saying that, it's nice to have space. I like living in five acres for a reason. And I think you're right, talking helps.
I'm not sure what you mean by this.