Growing up, my mom always taught me the importance of doing good. My mom was always bent on generosity, kindness and all other virtues. These virtues were evident in her actions, which I closely observed. As I matured, these values became a big part of me, guiding my actions and steps. Doing good became formulaic. I’ve always been like this for as long as I can remember. I wouldn’t call myself a good person, but I try as hard as I can to do good. However, what I’ve noticed about human beings is that when you do good, people often step on your head with all kinds of shoes. Not only do they take your good acts for granted, but they also exploit it. When they discover that doing good is your weak point, they use it against you, stabbing you with a 6 inch knife.
On several occasions, I have done good deeds, only to regret my actions shortly after. Have you ever been in a situation where you helped someone, but they made you regret your actions and then you wish you’d never helped them in the first place? Yes, I understand that it is important to do good. I am of the school of thought that doing good makes you a better person, but sometimes good deeds are met with regrets. Sometimes, people make you wonder if you should stop doing good and become heartless. A few days ago, I found myself in a situation where I did something good and instead of getting appreciated, I got stabbed in the back in return. In this post, I’ll share my experience.
Two weeks ago, around 7 am, a guy came knocking on my door. Although he doesn’t stay in my hostel, I see him frequently. Apparently, my slides (sandals) were outside. I have two pairs, and I’d only worn the one outside twice since I got it. According to him, he had a program in school and didn’t have anything to wear. He pleaded and asked if I could lend him my slides for the day, promising to return it in the evening. I confirmed if he’d truly return it that evening and he assured me he would. You should note that when he came to beg for the slides, my mind didn’t wander off to the possibilities that he might not return it. His statement that he had nothing to wear mattered. So, without thinking twice, I gave it to him.
He was supposed to return the slides that evening, but he didn’t. I gave him the benefit of a doubt. “Maybe something happened that kept him busy. Maybe he’ll return it tomorrow morning.” 24 hours turned into 48, and 48 turned into 72. I didn’t see traces of this guy for more than a week. My friends told me they’d be seeing him wearing my slides everywhere. I narrated this story to my friends online. While some of them said I shouldn’t have given him the slides in the first place, others agreed that I did the right thing by giving him. If I knew it would turn out like this, I wouldn’t have given him at all.
Yesterday marked two weeks since he came to borrow my slides with the promise of returning it that evening. Interestingly, this morning, I went out to get something. On my way back, I saw this guy and he was wearing my slides!!! When he saw me, he wished he could disappear into thin air. I’m pretty sure he wished he had the power to transfer back in time so he’d avoid me. But it was too late. I’d seen him. I was so pisded when I saw the condition of the slides on his leg. I’d only worn them twice and he’d already flattened it with his gigantic legs. Well, after raising my voice and going back and forth, I collected the slides from him and gave him a slippers to wear home. I did this so he wouldn’t walk bare-footed.
Now, I can’t wear the slides anymore because it is now 3 times bigger than it was before. Even though I’m pretty sure the slides are now useless, I collected them from him. Do you think I did the right thing by giving him the slides in the first place? Also, do you think I should have collected them back?
Thanks for reading.
Hey Favey, reading this, I had so many thoughts running in and out of my head and even at this point I’m not sure what I have to say but I’d say something anyways.
I have also been in a position when I felt like I was wrong showing kindness to someone and I hated that I felt so. Doing good is good, the problem is the person that the good is done to. So, no matter the outcome of our kind heart towards someone, we shouldn’t regret it, instead, we should learn from them and make sure we don’t make people regret doing good to us too.
It’s fine that you took the slides back but I would have also supported you if you had left it for him after telling him what he did was wrong, trust me, he would respect you even more because that is not what most people would do.
Remember I asked you if you could give him back the slides? That is my suggestion in this case because you can’t use that slide as you’d normally use it and that will make a lot of difference because not everyone can do that. But then, it’s just a suggestion.
First off, is it nice that you had so many things running in and out of your mind? I guess it’s good. Let’s have it.
Alright, I guess we have all been in that situation. Trust me, Hope. I love doing good. It pleases my heart when I help people. Why do you think I have him in the first place without even thinking of the possibility that he might not return it?
Sadly, the world is not so simple, love. If I had left it, he would have done it over and over again. Remember I told you that I saw him outside and then he promised to return it the next day, but he didn't. He lied, Hope.
He’s a bad person…
I know you love doing good more than anyone, at least these days.
Yeah, the world is not so simple and I also understand that too. But giving him the benefits of the doubt, this was his first time ever asking you for something and he did this, I believe most people if not everyone deserves a second chance.
Exactly! He is a bad person and you want to pay him back in his own coin. Well love, if I ever tell you a story about something like this or anything related, don’t let me pay someone back in their own coin, I know paying evil with good is definitely the best (but the hardest).
And I know, it’s hard, I even doubt I’d be able to do it and that is why I’m just going to leave you to making the final call because I trust you’d make the best choice 🥰 (whatever it is, I support you).
Paying evil with good is alright, but you cannot always be goody goody. Sometimes, you need to pay people in their own coin. That doesn't make you a bad person. Again, life is not simple.
Thanks so much for your kind words.🥹❤️
Come to my front first, I need to tell you something darling 🥹.
Coming.🏃🏃
Aww 🥹
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Some people take our good deeds for granted but that shouldn't stop us from doing good anyway.