This is a fantastic piece of writing! The vivid descriptions really pull you into the world, making it easy to imagine the environment and feel the tension of the journey. I love how you bring the characters to life—Lily’s excitement and curiosity are infectious, and the subtle bond between her and Xander adds a nice touch of warmth to the story. The pacing feels just right, with a steady buildup of anticipation as the expedition progresses. The mix of danger, awe, and light-hearted moments makes it a well-rounded and engaging read. Plus, the way you describe the surface world, with all its beauty and underlying threats, is so immersive. Overall, this piece has great flow, and I’m left wanting to see where the story goes next. Awesome job!
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Eee! 😃 Thank you so much for your kind critique!!! 😊
xD That's good to know! That's something I really struggle with. I'm forcing myself so hard to not just jam them together and say, "Now kiss!!!!!" haha 😅😅😅😅