I just have to get this off of my chest!
I have a friend that is an over the road trucker. He is only home on the weekends. He is married and his wife has a full time job as well as taking classes to finish her master degree. They have two children that are just over a year old and they spend their days in day care.
Now don’t get me wrong here I am not saying that any of that is a bad thing! You have to do what you have to do to get money. But there is apart of this story that I do have a problem with. I have tried to express my concerns with him but they have fallen on deaf ears.
It has always wanted to have a homestead after he got out of the Army but it was not his wife’s dream. But she went along with it because she wanted to support her husband. I have to commend her for that!
So now he has his own property and he now raises goats! When he first told me that I was like alright buddy! But at that time their was always someone at home to take care of the goats. But time has changed and they both had to get a job.
Like I said before there is nothing wrong with that! But here is were I’m seeing the problem that I told you that I talked to him about.
He is an over the road trucker that is only home on the weekends. His wife works all day then goes to night classes to finish her degree. He then picks up her children a 7pm then goes home. She then has to start dinner, give the children baths, get the kids ready for bed, do her school work, then after all of that she has to go out and take care of the animals. Now if you only have a couple of goats that would not be that big of a deal but they are up to 57 of them. But now my friend keeps getting more goats with out even talking to his wife first. He has not taken into consideration what type of work load that he is putting on his wife. Not to mention if any thing happens to one of the animals when they are gone. The animal won’t even be found until about 9 at night when his wife checks on them. She has said many times to us as well as him that this was his dream not hers.
I just want people that are thinking about living this life style to know it is a group effort. You have to be considerate of the other people in your family. You have to know that what ever you are doing that everyone can handle it. You have to be will and able to listen to the other members of your family and you have to be willing to compromise with one another. When you become a homesteader you and your family now become a team. If you can’t work with the team you will fail! If you think you can make a decision with out talking it over with at lest your wife or husband first you will fail! Every decision you make on your homestead does and will affect someone else in your family.
Thank you for reading my post and I hope that it helps at lest one person out there.
I agree whole-heartedly. Part of managing a marriage or a partnership is to lesson each others burdens, not add to them. No matter how good natured an individual is, over time, added burdens turn into resentments.
Is it bad that im more concerned about the well being of the animals then their relationship?
The animals are innocent and have no control over anything. You can't do anything about their relationship, that's up to them. So no, you are not bad.
I have tried to tell them that maybe they should cut down on some of them. So what did he do? He got more!
You've done all you can. As their friend just be there to help pick up the pieces when it all falls apart.
The animals are the one that have to suffer here because they can not take care of them self's.
that is so true! when you live this life you want to make it as easy as possible for every one.
Very good things to be thinking about. I hope that your friend figures it out, but for now, there is a good lesson here for all of us.
I just hope that people will at lest think about what I wrote.
I have a video coming out this Thursday on this exact topic. Im not trying to be a dick, just honest, THEY SHOULD SALE THE GOATS! If they cant take the time the animals need they shouldn't have them! Its their life and their animals but without having someone there, its only going to hurt the goats! Love you guys! What breed to they have?
You know the only the only reason you have a video coming out about this is because you read this post LOL! We love you guys as well. and the goats that they have are Kiko's and Nubian's.
Full kikos? And i dont mention goats, i talk about horses and rabbits. Abs u get visibly angry
WHile it has always been my dream of homesteading, my husband has been willfully inching more towards it to. Granted I take on most of the prep work and work itself, but he is supportive in his way.
Yes, he works a 60+ hour a week job and I am a SAHWife, but he is looking toward his retirement in the next decade and has come to realize the joy it brings to me to garden, plant, can, and make our home the way I envision it every day.
He has started to become more coherent of his surroundings, the consumerism of people and how not to waste things. Small (baby) steps, right?
That is so great that you both are willing to try this life style! It really does go along way when you know that you have someone that is their to support you. And hey baby steps are still steps in the right direction!
That hii poo ihh
Ever endeavour in life takes compromise and a willingness to cooperate on mutual goals. It does not work out well when it is only one person's dream. You also need good open communication. In this case, the animals are innocent bystanders waiting for a catastrophe to happen. There are times in our lives when all we can do is stand by and watch it happen. People will only accept help when they want it, not before. An old saying: You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink" still holds true.
I see that you care about the whole of the story. It is hard to watch when you see a fix and no one in the picture even see an issue. Good luck to you
It seems to me the husband is not thinking things through and just going forward with the homestead plans he has without considering the changes in their circumstances. This is putting a huge burden on his wife and their relationship. I really am worried about the wife,children and animals. 57 goats is a full time job in its self.
great points made, which is why we are still in transition. There is so much to learn still!