This is me. In my favourite setting. Incase you cannot donate from the image I am making music on the floor of my friends home. I am a musician. It has been six and a half weeks since a friend of mine told me about this website, ‘SteemIt’. Yes, you got it. I am a major procrastinator. I'm Conor. I am soon to turn twenty five years of age and I believe my life is spiralling out of control into a tunnel of fucking shit.
First of all I want to clarify something, I AM NOT NEGATIVE. Secondly, I like to believe that I question everything and I am often very in touch with my feelings. I prefer to let life flow rather than to control every situation that occurs in my life.
Once upon a time when I was fresh into the halls of my new university I was an awkward but happy-go-lucky male with no filter. I would ask questions to strangers without crippling anxiety shredding me to pieces. I could drink thirty three double Bacardi's and be totally shit faced without feeling like a disgrace. I could enjoy my day without overthinking every single detail in which I could control my life. Basically, I lived for the present moment, for the ‘now’. The happiest time of my life was all in the present moment. I think I made some pretty awesome decisions in my ‘present’ self. I decided I would travel parts of the world, I started making music with my friend, I read books upon books, I chased the summer between New Zealand, UK and Australia. All of this was very character building, void filling and fun. Don’t get me wrong I had many responsibilities, travelling the world alone is very daunting at times, especially where money and social security is concerned. One day I was diving into a isolated waterfall in the secluded depths of northern New Zealand. Then one day something happened. I started to think. I started to over think.
This is me during my trip to Australia in 2016
I started to be over come with fear about my choices. This included my age. Questions like ‘can I still justify this life if I’m nearly twenty two? What about my life when I get home? When will I have time for my music? The questions kept coming. No matter how many times I would try and focus on how amazing these experiences was I started to question my masculinity and then further along I began to question my social success. As a result of this I started feeling like time was running out. Like I was chasing an idea. Like I was running away from becoming a classified adult. All my friends at home were starting careers, having babies and making a start into their adult life. This is when I started partying more, I started smoking more drugs, I started to actually wander away from the best place I have visited in the whole wide world, the present.
So I have decided to connect with people via Steemit. My aim is to share, through song, video, poems and stories my journey and my past circumstances. I am here to evolve. I won't be 'filtering' myself or my deep, clouded, uncomfortable mind. I hope to create a space where people can feel they can open up about the shit us twenty-somethings go through. I hope to create a path back towards the present.
I'm following You.
great post, hope you will give us special lyrics for steemit!
of course haha
hello @brainjuice and welcome to steemit!
this is a great place with a great community .. glad to have you.
@ricmark
glad to be here!
welcome to steemit brainjuice
enjoy and happy steemit !!
thanks man!
welcome to steemit world . Always Remember 5 points..
1)Never copy paste content from any where ..
2)It can take some time but if you work hard , God will definitely give you success..
3)Never abuse anyone or post haterade content on steemit..
4)Daily post will increase your REPUTATION SCORE (number by the side of your name)
Reputation score is mainly based on upvotes and comments .
No matter what you post ,if it gets upvotes and comments then reputation score will increase
Don't let anyone flag you or downvote you..
5)Your first post should be your introduction..
I wish you success
You can follow me @be4u