Hey man don't be so hard on yourself. You will manage. I'm going through the same thing - you know - getting used to a hummus diet and the stay-home on weekends plan is not so bad when you have a vision in mind. Every successful human being starts from the bottom, and some go through it multiple times.
You can definitely take control of your life and achieve abundance. Don't ever for a second think you are broke/poor/uncapable, because as Les Brown famously says, "I am not broke, I am just overcoming a cashflow problem." You've got to raise your standards and manifest your desires.
If it helps, my father left us with nothing (not even $1) and his absence made us stronger, and so were you as a result. You're a self-made man. You don't need your parents or steemit, you are a born leader! So get your shit together and make a difference in your life!
Upvoted :)