; A Path in Embodying Vitality in Spirit ;.

in #introduceyourself7 years ago (edited)

THANK YOU

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I begin with Gratitude; for the real rawness of shared collective experience; consciousness relating to source-self in all the variety we have as humans. Once we get past the -judgement-, within self and the external; so much magic can occur in celebration of unique expression.

I am a dakini remembering what it is to be jedi
I am a metaphysical bridge of spirit embodied
I am a health focalist
I am a soft quiet humble child
I am a sensual fire tiger
I am a lucid dreamer, and cognitive awakener
I am the poet and the muse ; the logician and the magi
I am a beckon of light with a shadow creature self
I am an alchemical process rebirthing new starlight
for evolution
I am human...and more..

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I in Eye; we as one

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And so it begins
Its vulnerable to share some of this...yet what better way to start; here on a new platform, from right here and now- to follow the threads through to the infinites of potential weave of reflection. Start from the middle, and ripple outwards.
Non linearity is Key.

The rollercoaster of awareness escalates as we excel.. The depths we feel these days are deeper, and the solar rays all the more brighter. All of us know the nights of shadows in the mind/body/soul and it makes all the difference to feel seen. In our brightest Shine, we feel unstoppable and impenetrable, and its beautiful to see how we coalesce and assist each other.

For a few years now in peaks of Saturn's lessons I've rode the waves of turbulent emotional and psychic sensitivity. At times social media has been a brilliant platform of support, and yet the algorithms of the Book of Face at times have made me question alliance. Sometimes connection on this glowing screen-experience we are sharing is a potent lifethread, and at others a confusing rabbit hole. The Hug sometimes trumps them all, yet for those in phases of The Hermit, not always available.

Estrangement from feeling loveable has also come feeling misunderstood and unheard. Its true that in person often my natural low tone of voice gets spoken over and interrupted. I've worked with this and i got used to it, not offended, yet it is part of a Story i wish to rewrite; to be heard in all the ways I feel to verbally dance. Sometimes I've heard side comments and thoughts from certain others in community that my poetry and morphic holographic forms of expression are 'too far out there'. 'Why can't you just speak more average?' 'Just Be Clear'. And yet in the moments of presence in my artistic codec fluidity, what is expressed is the most accurate imprint converted from vibrations into the english language. Of course we are always growing up however, childlike adulting timeless wizards we are. I query what is even if there is an 'average' out there.

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Grandmother Aya showed me once that once of the things i was brought here for is to bring through a new synaesthetic language to this planet and society. What that means or 'how-to' im still discovering and unfolding. I was born as a complex creature; given 6 names at birth, no 3d hometown and a deep knowing that it's been a stretch in navigating how to fully incarnate into this plane.

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Its all a non-linear weave; this thought I often orbit back to settle in; to perceive and Remember.

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These are foundational realization moments, these past months of nesting in my city of birth. A place to come and die, to be reborn and to re-identify with what's important.

Maturing Grace forms.

In my meditations, journaling and reiteration of priorities, I've spiraled within to focus on some Truth; that all though my multidimensional nature needs many artistic outlets and play, a core part of my journey has been around Health.
Spirit-Mind-Body-Soul-Essence=Vitality

This is our birthright; to be wild beautiful sensuous Beings in an abundance of health and wealth.

As both of my parents were/are health enthusiasts; our tripod family travelling to warm countries in winters, I was given the opportunity of eating whole-foods, a tangible relationship with metaphysical health and other realms through connecting through my senses. As my individual life thread expanded, this continued this; working in 3 health food stores, multiple whole-foods restaurants&cafes, distributing Essential Oils, starting my own alchemical elixir/raw chocolate venture, and coordinating and helping hold space for many forms of ceremonial amazonian plant medicines.

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Even with such a platform abundance to leap from, my health has been on a rollercoaster. In the low ends of my health collapses 5 years ago, I lost a lot of weight and was about 100 pounds (for 5'6" thats intense!);I had extreme difficulty eating a wide variety of foods. I have been blessed to have many foodie nutritional nuts as kyn to reflect with and receive new potential pathways to explore..At one point in my search I started contemplating Lyme's disease, and/or Mycoplasma as I began dialoguing with a significant 'Other' field of micro-consciousness in my body, and thus my path drew me to Kambo. The frog medicine became a potent ally for a chapter. Now, in this recent past year, my association with plant medicine has shifted gears, and I am still in the process of coming to clarity with all of it..

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Now, over the past 2 years, my self confidence and body positivism has been the lowest since I was a teenager. I have put on more weight/density than my system feels happy in, and the overwhelming search in absorbable nutrients has worn me out, resulting in overwhelm-depression/stress /low metabolism. Mental fog is a part of it; with that a numbness and dissociation with my physical form, which is has been near impossible to effectively explain to others what it feels like or how I subtly retract inside myself and thus feel less like the 'me' I wish to and LOVE to share with joy and imagination activation.

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Self-image is quite the subject. Its been a humbling experience to go from a playful extrovert contact-improv enthusiast, music loving, nomadic space-pixie vibe with a healthy level of self-love and positive body image...to how I've been day-to-day feeling in these times, especially this last year.. Introverting hardcore, I have felt neither the ability nor desire to interface with Vancouver and the dance community I was once identified as my 'Tribe'. The essence of support my Soul has needing, is to be in physical presence with Truth, and only connecting with the Other when Truth aligns with reflection..

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I've been eating organic, gone on courses of supplements and minerals, doctors tests, journeyed with plant medicines of multiple kinds, osteopathic sessions, medicinal mushrooms, acupuncture, paleo diet, blood type diet, raw food diet, bone broths, ayurvedic approach... The list goes on. At times ive felt like giving up, feeling hopeless in how to navigate forward in to feel in harmonic balance. I've been on a journey to the Beyond and back, seeking the codes and keys for holistic vital living.

Yet still persevering, I have been dedicated to calling in & creating a routine that has results and is grounded in effectiveness. This may be my Capricorn talking, but; Yo, I want structure! Nutrients that are bio-available. Metabolic energetic enhancement, to clear out this gunk that I don't need to carry around any more, and to next level my human potential! I'm exhausted of doing cleanses and elimination diets where I feel depleted afterwards. I desire to live in grace and ease!

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It feels like a Maze we are each navigating. A maze there is no map for, only guiding with our innate intuition and collected tools.

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I've come to a singularity point in feeling like a big next step needs to be taken to create stability in foundation. There are infinite gifts to unfold; we are only scratching the surface of what humans are designed to metamorphosize into. I am so excited in these times to be alive in experience, even amidst the struggle, pain and confusion of these past years. I believe myself, I believe in You, here reading this right now; and most of all I believe in what WE are awakening as..

It has been sensitive and vulnerable to share some of this.. yet self acceptance comes with Transparancy and wholeness, and therein grows perfect truth clarified. As you can see; I am a paradox of extremes. Not perfect yet now I am willing to See clearly, and be Seen, to accept what is, and move on in Grace. To rebirth from the ashes into Love again. I'm ready to be a catalyst for positive change and a conduit for light. My choice of reality is in wealth of joyful clean vibration of trust and resonance. It's integral in my core purpose to expand into as much of my greater potential in this life, and to assist in helping others cognitively awaken to the clearest essence imaginable. I'm done with feeling stagnant and stuck. I'm done feeling like there's something 'wrong' with me, and rewrite that into a script of abundance and vibrancy~*

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And honestly i've been weary of feeling like I'm doing this alone. I'm ready to come out of this cocoon! In this process of storytelling I have wished to clear this, and start authoring a new tale of exuberant Life~

I wish to Dance in freedom, magic, lightness and ease once more :.

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Opening the bridges of synergistic healing to all planes, and trusting this synchronistic woven path is bringing us balance to us all in exactly the way our Soul has designed, with swift fruition and sensuous ecstatic bliss~*

.; Ф ;.

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I do look forward to reading your future posts; so, hope for you the best in this much interesting & challenging environment. I like writing about several topics that call my attention, from travel, life, politics to science, food and technology. Here are some of my last posts, that if you can, read them and of course …. HAVE FUN.

https://steemit.com/engineering/@indepthstory/7-reasons-why-i-studied-mechanical-engineering-so-here-you-are

find them interesting…? click on the FOLLOW and leave some comments

… have a great life trip here …

@indepthstory

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