Howdy Steemit?!!! Feeling blue? Here is the post of the living dead. Cheer up steemit!

Hello. My name is S. but my nickname is usually the default. Why? Two reasons. 1: in my childhood I loved to play computer games of the RPG genre. Fallout. Magazine review video games "Game.exe". The editors took the game all the staff for one character. And since the character was one and the people behind it a lot of it is called default. For me it was a great philosophical revelation. Something like "anonymous", only, in my opinion, more subtle. I went to a good, elite school of our city. My parents were not rich and influential people, I just was a smart kid and my mother wanted me to get into this school. I wanted to be a doctor and knew that I want to study in medical University. But I wanted to be a doctor because of some strange reasons. Would some power, status, importance. So I went to med school.University. And there was all bad. But I survived. In residency I got married. Then I realized that it was time to earn. So how to live with mother and wife in a small apartment wasn't cool. There was no financial support for me and wife, and that the most sad- not expected. And we gone to the village doctors through the state program on support of rural doctors. This allowed us to take a loan and buy an apartment. But to work in the village was a complete nightmare. Wife went on maternity leave and we went back to my mom. Only worked I. To live in the purchased apartment was not possible and we lease it to pay the loan. I started to get tired. My job I didn't really like. However because of the natural charisma and luck, I managed to get a very good place. In fact, many peers and friends was jealous of me. In fact I bought an apartment a car and I have a child. But was loans, expenses, and a lot of work. And I kept thinking about the different variants of earnings. Then, deciding that the job is not fun, cohabitation with parents, and all that... And as for my family to live in the capital is more perspectively - I have a wife and child and moved to the capital. The job I was looking for still lived in his hometown. After moving the czpital the nightmare has begun. Due to the fact that I was constantly looking for sources of extra earnings I started trying to play poker. Read a few books, articles, watched various twitch steams. Began to delve into ICM and other things... In the end my semiconcentrated plummeted and at work the problems started. Now I am constantly under threat of dismissal. I recently started seeing a psychotherapist and read about the stock exchange. Really want to have a financial cushion of safety to be able 3 months just to sit quietly and think about what you want to do. Continued participation in the rat race drives you crazy and destroys a person.

Envy to people who've found their place on earth and the job they really like... Others...Wish u luck)))