If I may mention a couple things that came to mind as I read your comment...
I totally get where you are coming from! I was on medications for a long time (about 15 years on and off) and I ended up deciding that it was really about quality of life. Like, on meds or off, what kind of life do I want? What kind of relationships do I want? With myself, with others? It was the biggest thing actually that kept me ON medications initially, because at least on meds I could have reasonably normal relationships with people.Hi @tryskele π thanks for the warm welcome! π And thanks so much for sharing.
I always kept practicing mindfulness tho, meditation, tai chi (a huge part of healing for me), yoga, tons of therapy (especially CBT) but all these things I realized were doing one thing for me... Connecting me to the source, to my source, my core of who I am. I started peeling back the layers of self, feeling out where there is resistance and transforming it in to spaciousness. It's a long path, it's hard. It's a lot of practice, and takes (still takes!) two things above all, courage and self love.
The fact that you take meds now is not bad. Quite the opposite. Just because you choose to take them now, for the sake of why you choose to take them (whatever that may be) shows me that you are actually super strong. It's not caving in, to accept help in any way, even if it's from pharmaceuticals. Especially from pharmaceuticals, as there is always that love/hate relationship there... Appreciating the relief while wondering where we'd be without them.
That takes strength, on a daily basis.
I started writing about mental wellness not to show people they can get off their meds (though I am happy to be off them, my goal was to be happy, not unmedicated). I started writing to help guide people who want more out of life than the usual convention. There is a big wide world inside of you that is waiting for you to dig in and explore it. π You already have paths to your source, that's the best place to start.
Whatever path inspires you to find your way to truth of self, that's the path to wellness. Just my humble opinion.
My suggestion to you... Keep diving in, never give up hope that the core of who you are contains the greatest wisdom, keep practicing.
What they don't tell us in western medicine is that we are our own best healers, but we absolutely are. You know You better than anyone else does, stay strong in that. π
Thanks so much for checking out this post and your support. I would love to hear more about your journey.
Xx ToL