The Artist, the Junky, the Gambler, and the Sodimiser!...
Okay! Okay, hold on! Let us not.
As a depressive man in his 40s, I have lately been wrestling with the idea or ambition to read more and starting to read again. I jump in deep, going for Dostoyevsky, the great Russian author. And after having started this post of mine, it struck me that my entrance, introduction, as well as a huge part of my former "online persona". ( @Mr. Eythorphoto). And this, in reference to the hilarius torment of an intoduction,. Written two years ago! ( @Eythor-arts )!
As pretentius as it probably is, I find it interesting, however freezing, as it dawned on me that I was writing very similarly to Dostoyevsky´s beginning of "Crime and Punishment," where the starting sentences are.
"I am a spiteful man." "I am a heful man; I am an unattractive man!"
There, the protogonist is self-degrading in order to reach his audience! ... (nothing about it, just something i found very inteat will i write about?
- Blockchain tecnology
- Blockchain economics
- HIVE blockchain
- Computer gaming
- My life so far, as well as the journey as i try to dig myself out of this rut!
- I will try to keep this blog orderly, informative, fun, helpful, reachable, friendly, and "decently composed" because I can! and should!
- Photography
- Art
My Blockchain story!
I bought my first Bitcoin at the price of 214$ in 2009-2011 My memory is hazy with exact dates due to drugs and traumatic events.
I made the equivalent of a house by selling and trading BTC. At that time, I also sold a lot to local grey areas and straight-up criminal entities that intended the coin for drug importing.
I had a swimming pool in my garden before the age of 25, but it was always almost "broken.". I was on such an edge since, for the BTC, I sometimes took payment in straight-up fresh imported drugs. And I had my anxiety up to my throat every day.
I had my first son at 27 and shortly after decided that my lifestyle was unaceptable to him, so in a hurry, I couldn't do this anymore. I packed our bags and hastily relocated my family to Denmark. I had 200 Danish Kroner, the equivalent of about $100, in my pocket.
And the dream of a family home, after a brief conversation about renting an apartment from a man named Bjorn and his phone number in my back pocket. It worked out; he picked us up somewhere in rural Denmark after we had taken the wrong train!resting that I seem to do,,, constantly! And a new goal set here and now is to stop that!
I intend to write about that and the things that happened to us, resulting in me, at 35, being homeless and alone, having lost everything. I intend to document my rise and exit from this state of depression, socioeconomic hell, and self-inflected major injuries to the soul and body!
Those descriptive sentences above are not "writing about it or uncovering anything; uncovering stuff through writing is evidently what the writer benefits from his contribution to this writer-reader relationship!
Like, in your head, how does my voice sound? Yeah, it sounds nothing like that, and I smell it. wtf dude, I cought myself there. Those who spot what I did, comment, please!
A few Photo´s to "mix things up and introduce you guys to my art.
I begin presenting these pictures as proof of brain, proof of human, and proof of artistic talent, lol.. or what? Yeah, i´m pretty decent, though, i´d say for myself!
Just something from work folders on the desktop waiting to get diligently solved as their owners lives slowly disintegrate into a haze of drugs, violence, sex, and good humour.
Yes, actually, it´s that last one there that really matters, because getting through the real-life storms of life—the life-threatening ones, the soul-changing ones, the un-understandable ones.
One needs to have good humour, and that is a sign that this soul will persevere!
Humor and good friend(s) or family. Notice that ONE person standing by us can be the entire difference; ONE is in need enough for society to barely function and head on from there.
Reading this, you might get the feeling I am getting right now that trauma is like an ocean that overtakes our lives, and we spend the rest of it frantically trying to find our way back to safety, where we are not being violated!
That´s what once again happened to me when my longtime soulmate's fiancé announced a divorce, two years or so after I was accused wrongfully of attempted murder without any valid evidence, and we lost custody over our two young boys.
We kept on fighting for them those two last years, though they were hell, and the relationship slowly deteriorated.
But in the end, the pressures, sorrows, and mental illness eventually broke my darling's spirit. Which hasn't returned to this day.
It is fucked up; it is the only sensible way to understand it—living with a person for a decade. then i the blink of an ey their precence isnt the same, they have a new name, and in my case avoided all contact or explææanaition for 2 years.
You are left dumbstruck by silence! Your inner dialogue, which was also centered around everyday struggles, is so closely in tune with that "responder" that life loses meaning in a new way!
It also does with the fact that you used to build your world veiw on this "soulmate theory" feeling as if you´ve got a partner who turns hastily on you, say in a betrayal scenario, or just simple rejection. You lose belief in that specialness, leaving you "raw.".
Everything that gave your life meaning. And it is happening again; it´s different losing child custody; its so inhumane and discusting; you are violated in a special way!
And after that read, you deserve a load of photos
posting two more for Christmas, my darlings!
I did say 2, I meant 4. And apologies for having gotten emotional in my intro post; well, well i´ve consumed so many drugs that I am excused!
I thank those who read. I prosmise to try and have a clearer focus on this blog; it should give you and me more than just HIVE and blockchain profits. But friendship and togetherness.
Hive is unbelivably the place i thought abbout to "re-connect" to society; it has worked wonders for me before. I love this blockchain super community, and let's RIDE THE BULLRUN!
#POWERUP 100%
Eythor Hive !