No regrets. No strongholds to keep. No plan to back out anymore.
I heard the invitation of National Conference (NC) 2017 of Inter-Varsity Christian Fellowship of the Philippines (IVCF) last summer by some of the staff who tried to persuade me. But I have in my mind that I need to spend my Christmas vacation with my family. At first, I was struggling with how I'll spent money there, how life would it be if I'm always away from my family. If finance will always be problem and not a solution. Deal on it! God answered! - - I got promo fare, my family was positive and grateful to send me off.
What was God's plan of sending me to NC? First, He pointed my long unwashed dirts of mine to a deep exposure of confession to the damage I had with others. Even hearing some unresolved issues from the past in the ministry was a heavy one to catch. I and the ministry might be the same, not on the scenario, but from the struggles within from the hearts, hurts, and dirts. Secondly, He recall my purpose on mission and gave a concrete example of what I am searching for long time ago. 'Coz sometimes I' m narrow with it to the extent that I always make pity when I fail on doing His purppse on mine. Thirdly, my being alone sometimes in the conference was not really a plan but a result of pride. I maybe so noisy before and taking this indifferent in me was a big problem. And I found out that God revealed Himself by the people's stories, victories and struggles - that when I maybe so expressive, I may forget to listen to somebody. I may lose patience and look forward to be a star. He humbled me and take some time to listen grasp their life.
This NC2017 took me to a journey of repentance, allegiance, mission-assurance, and listen to people's observance. The Lord is good to the point even I and the ministry are not faithful but He chose to renew and rebuild His people by His love and mercy.