so 3 women are left to fill 1 position at the CIA....they have completed all the tests but there is only one test left...
the first woman enters the room for the final test...sitting there is her husband blindfolded, with headphones on and a gun on the table. to be a member of the CIA she must kill her husband with one clean shot to the head....she starts crying, grabs her husband and leaves, she does not want the job any more.
The 2nd woman walks in, same scenario, she points the gun to her husbands head, starts shaking, puts the gun down and says "I can't do it" and leaves with her husband...
The 3rd woman goes in, same scenario...but the person conducting the interview/tests has been waiting outside the room for 20 minutes...
The woman comes out breathing heavily...she says "There was no bullets in your stupid gun so I had to beat him to death with the chair".
Two friends are doing conversation sitting on a field. At that time an airplane flying over their heads-
First friend: Tell me, why is there a huge fan on the plane's head?
Second friend: Why?
First friend: The pilot does not get hot during the plane, so for that.
Second friend: not at all
First friend: Hmmm! If you do not believe you can stop the fan when you are flying, and see how the pilot is sweating!
It is the middle of the night, two cars both slightly cross over the white line in the centre of the road. They collide and damage is done, miraculously neither driver is hurt.
They got out. One is a doctor, one is a lawyer. The lawyer calls the police and they say they will be there within 20 minutes.
It’s cold and damp, and both men are shaken up. The lawyer offers the doctor a drink of brandy from his hip flask, the doctor accepts, drinks and hands it back to the lawyer, who then puts it away.
“Aren’t you going to have a drink?” the doctor says.
“AFTER the police get here.” replies the lawyer
I’ve been very concerned about my son who’s dumb as f**k. One day my friend came around and met me sitting few blocks away from home thinking and looking so worried. He asked what the matter was? So I replied, my only son makes me sad as he’s so dumb and stupid.
He couldn’t believe it that my handsome son is dumb and fortunately for me to clear his doubt, my son was passing by on his way to play and so I called him. I told him to go home and Check if I’m at home . Immediately he dashed off and my friend was puzzled, only for my son to come back saying Dad
“Mom said, you’re not at home” and so my friend fainted 🤣🤣🤣🤣
I once met a woman at a busstop. She was good looking and I was a bit aroused. So I asked her:"Would you have sex with me for 1 million $?" And she looked at me and finally answered: "Well sure for 1 million$!" I saw my chance and replied:"Would you also have sex with me for 10$?" She got really upset and said:"What the hell do you think I am???" So I told her: "We already identified WHAT you are, now we are only talking about the price!" 😏
so 3 women are left to fill 1 position at the CIA....they have completed all the tests but there is only one test left...
the first woman enters the room for the final test...sitting there is her husband blindfolded, with headphones on and a gun on the table. to be a member of the CIA she must kill her husband with one clean shot to the head....she starts crying, grabs her husband and leaves, she does not want the job any more.
The 2nd woman walks in, same scenario, she points the gun to her husbands head, starts shaking, puts the gun down and says "I can't do it" and leaves with her husband...
The 3rd woman goes in, same scenario...but the person conducting the interview/tests has been waiting outside the room for 20 minutes...
The woman comes out breathing heavily...she says "There was no bullets in your stupid gun so I had to beat him to death with the chair".
My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.
Why the plane pilot sweat!
Two friends are doing conversation sitting on a field. At that time an airplane flying over their heads-
First friend: Tell me, why is there a huge fan on the plane's head?
Second friend: Why?
First friend: The pilot does not get hot during the plane, so for that.
Second friend: not at all
First friend: Hmmm! If you do not believe you can stop the fan when you are flying, and see how the pilot is sweating!
I thought Chicken Republic was a country when I first heard of it
It is the middle of the night, two cars both slightly cross over the white line in the centre of the road. They collide and damage is done, miraculously neither driver is hurt.
They got out. One is a doctor, one is a lawyer. The lawyer calls the police and they say they will be there within 20 minutes.
It’s cold and damp, and both men are shaken up. The lawyer offers the doctor a drink of brandy from his hip flask, the doctor accepts, drinks and hands it back to the lawyer, who then puts it away.
“Aren’t you going to have a drink?” the doctor says.
“AFTER the police get here.” replies the lawyer
😂
Haha! As Homer J would say...
It's funny cos it's true :)
Wait for me honey, I’m just finishing my make-up.
You don’t need make-up, Jane.
Oh, Richard…. really? That is so sweet of you!
You need plastic surgery...
I really like your posts.
Why? I am confused. He has not written anything on this post. I really like to know why?
Well @sirvoltesalot I think you have your winner here.
Dumb Son
I’ve been very concerned about my son who’s dumb as f**k. One day my friend came around and met me sitting few blocks away from home thinking and looking so worried. He asked what the matter was? So I replied, my only son makes me sad as he’s so dumb and stupid.
He couldn’t believe it that my handsome son is dumb and fortunately for me to clear his doubt, my son was passing by on his way to play and so I called him. I told him to go home and Check if I’m at home . Immediately he dashed off and my friend was puzzled, only for my son to come back saying Dad
“Mom said, you’re not at home” and so my friend fainted 🤣🤣🤣🤣
I once met a woman at a busstop. She was good looking and I was a bit aroused. So I asked her:"Would you have sex with me for 1 million $?" And she looked at me and finally answered: "Well sure for 1 million$!" I saw my chance and replied:"Would you also have sex with me for 10$?" She got really upset and said:"What the hell do you think I am???" So I told her: "We already identified WHAT you are, now we are only talking about the price!" 😏