Nothing trumps being connected to someone deeply and after leaning on them for comfort only to never be heard of again and more so, not knowing what happened to them with imaginations running wild. I can relate with that.
Maybe he pulled through, maybe he changed location, maybe he felt hurt, maybe he lost touch and he is searching for you too. Maybe he thinks of you as you of him, maybe he gave up just to be at peace and have rest. Whatever it is @stellabelle, hold on to those sweet memories he gave you and focus on that for now. I am sure you always pull through and this wouldn't be any different. I pulled through losing dad, mum and sister at different stages, so can you. Let your good works be in memory of him and you will always have that piece of him with you for ever. Stay strong.
P.S: You should draw more! You are good sweet lady.