I cringed and nodded reading your post because as a Korean American, I've experienced similar situations with men (mostly white) fetishizing being with me as an Asian woman. On first dates or even before them, if I sense they're one of those fetish dudes, I'm out. I don't fit the stereotype and don't subscribe to those beliefs of putting any women or really people into racial or stereotyped buckets. That being said, I have over the past few years had to turn the examination light onto myself and wonder if my pattern/history of dating more white men than Asian men meant I am subconsciously making similar stereotypes of men. I have always been open to dating across all races, however, my pattern and often preference have been white men. And that makes me put into question if that's based on biases that are deeply held on my own. I'd like to believe that's not the case, but I think it's important to keep checking within ourselves on these type of questions. Following and upvoted.
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Yeah, I admit I have that trait too. Partially because I was bullied by a bunch of guys in middle school pretty badly, and partially because of my dad . Or I could be subconsciously racist too. I have to keep looking in to myself, that's for sure.