Isn't it funny how stuff looks so easy from the outside when you are not the one experiencing it from the inside?
Let's talk relationships for a second.
Can you think of that one friend who is always wrapped up with a toxic ex?
They get together, breakup, rekindle, break up & so on?
Sounds strangely familiar, I'm assuming.
But why?
You don't know me & I don't know you. So how do I know that you have a friend like this?
It's because we all have a friend like this. And if you don't, then YOU are that friend.
This is a part of the emotional intelligence world that you will not see on Google.
This is a Story About the Toxic Ex.
A few years ago, I was dating this girl in undergrad.
We met at a club party & immediately hit it off.
Bengali, short, nice figure & great personality.
17 year old me really thought she was the one.
Well, we ended up dating for a few months until the crazy started to come out.
Not just from her, but from me as well.
We were both always getting into arguments, bickering about nonsense & getting involved in useless drama.
Never could quite figure it out, but seemed like I was just as bad.
How come?
For my entire life, I had been the kind of guy to avoid drama, stay laid back & avoid that stuff. But why was I getting involved with that stuff with this girl?
17 year old me had no clue.
But 27 year old me does.
It's called toxicity.
I see a lot of people stay in toxic relationships because they don't know what toxic means. Well let me clarify it for you. Someone is toxic if:
They drain you.
Bring out your worst qualities.
I went onto find out this girl was not the one, but it didn't end so soon.
My entire life, I had clowned relationships which involved people who got together, broke up, rekindled, broke up & so on.
But now?
I was involved in one of those relationships.
After the breakup phase, is what I call the 'dance.'
The dance is the portion where the toxic ex tries to re enter your life in a subtle way.
That is when they mask their toxic ways to take you down memory lane. Watch out for the 'remembers!'
'Remember how we first met?'
'I remember when we took that trip.'
'Remember our outfit from that Halloween party'
You get the point.
Getting caught in the dance is toxic for your moving on process.
Needless to say, that girl & I eventually went to breakup. But believe me when I say that I could have saved tons of time if I knew back then what i know now.
You may not want to hear this, but toxicity rarely melts away, it is just brushed under the rug..
It's tough to get over an ex.
'Why?'
Because that toxic person was also the same person who once made you smile.
How should you deal with an ex?
You cut ties with them (my advice is for people dating, not married couples with kids).
Dump out their gifts, block them on social media & delete their number.
A toxic ex will always try to re-enter your life.
ESPECIALLY when you are trying to level up.
But remember.
Humans are creatures of ENERGY.
If you want to take your level up journey seriously, then you need to monitor who you allow into your world.
You may not want to hear this bud.
But no one said the level up journey was going to be easy.
Cut ties negativity, remove the anchor & reach your grandest self in the process.
One day this decision will make all the sense in the world.
Hustle Hacker 💲 💲 💲
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